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  • Category: Bigotry

    This category is dedicated to the bottom rung of humanity at its worst — racists, homophobes, and other bigots — and, occasionally, employees at their finest.

    The Race(ist) For The Last Chicken

    | Preston, England, UK | Bigotry, Food & Drink

    (I work late shifts, and mark down items to their final reduction.)

    Customer: “Have you not got any more cheap chicken?”

    Me: “No, sir, the lady just over there took our last pack, unfortunately.”

    (I gesture towards a small, lovely, Indian lady, who had come by and picked up some chicken breasts I just marked down.)

    Customer: “I’m not racist, but f****** p**** are always turning up and taking all the good stuff early! You can never stay one step ahead of them d*** foreigners!”

    Me: “Well, we have a first come, first served policy. Regardless of who she is, she was here first.”

    Customer: “Yeah, but you know what I mean! They come over here, and take everything for granted. They do what they f****** like, and take our cheap food! You follow me, don’t ya’?”

    Me: “Well, no, I don’t. Like I said, we have a first come, first served policy. We also have a policy against incendiary language, and I’m going to have to ask you to leave. Here’s a little hint for you; when you say “I’m not racist, but—”, it usually means you’re about to be racist. The exit’s third on the left.”

    Judging A Book By Its Fabulous Cover

    | Nashville, TN, USA | Bigotry, Food & Drink, Religion, Top

    (I am standing in the waiting area near the hostess station. A man who is gay is requesting a table. A primly dressed woman walks in.)

    Woman: “Ugh, how horrid! You should be ashamed of yourself dressing like one of those sinful f***! People will get the wrong idea about you.”

    (The man keeps his calm like he’s used to this.)

    Man: “Actually, ma’am, it wouldn’t be a wrong idea as I am—in fact—gay.”

    Woman: “Have you no shame at all!? You sound proud of it! You should be more like this young man.”

    (She gestures to me.)

    Woman: “He obviously is a proper, god-fearing individual.”

    Me: “I’m honored. You really believe he should be like me?”

    Woman: “Of course, you obviously have your priorities straight.”

    (I walk over to the man and extended a hand for a handshake. He takes it.)

    Me: “Well, you heard her…”

    (I lean in and give him a quick peck on the lips.)

    Me: “Never change sweetie.”

    (The other three people in the waiting area break out laughing and the woman goes beet.)

    Woman: “Well, I never!…”

    (She stomps out. The man and I end up sharing a table for dinner. We’re now good friends and we laugh about that meeting a lot.)

    Dining Sin

    | USA | Bad Behavior, Bigotry, Food & Drink, Top

    (I’m a waitress, seating a woman next to a pair of young men holding hands across the table. They are talking quietly to each other, very obviously on a date. One of the men is drastically shorter than the other, making him appear much younger.)

    Female Customer: “Well, isn’t that sweet, taking your little brother out? How old is he, 10?”

    (Customer #1 blushes and bites his lip.)

    Customer #2: “He’s 19, and he’s my boyfriend.”

    (I’m about to walk away, when the woman gasps and shrieks at me in outrage.)

    Female Customer: “HOW DARE YOU ALLOW THESE HEATHENS TO ACT LIKE THIS IN PUBLIC! YOU TWO SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELVES, YOU F*****S!”

    (Both men visibly flinch. The smaller starts pulling his hand away, blinking back tears. The taller catches it and gives him a reassuring smile. Being bisexual myself, I’ve learned how to deal with this.)

    Me: “Look at that couple over there.”

    (I point to a girl and boy, on the other side of the restaurant. They are about the same age, doing the exact same thing the other couple just was.)

    Me: “What do you think of them?”

    Female Customer: “Well, they’re cute!”

    (I point to the gay couple.)

    Me: “And if one of them was a girl?”

    (The female customer stammers furiously. She stands up, almost knocking the table over, and starts stomping away.)

    Female Customer: “I’m never coming here again! I’ll have you reported for allowing these f*****s to sin here!”

    (Luckily for me, my boss laughs in her face. He bans her from the restaurant, and calls other branches to warn them about her. The two men are incredibly sweet, and make sure to give me a twenty dollar tip. They’ve been regulars ever since!)

    Causing Disorder

    | Toronto, ON, Canada. | Bigotry, Health & Body

    (I have ASD—autism spectrum disorder.)

    Coworker: “What is it like to have ASD?”

    Me: “Well, it’s not that bad really.”

    (Just then, a customer walks into the chain.)

    Me: “Oh, hello, ma’am. What would you like?”

    Customer: “What’s not so bad?”

    Me: “Oh, it’s just that I have ASD. I was being asked what it’s like to live with it.”

    Customer: “What!?”

    Me: “I’m sorry. What did I say?”

    Customer: “YOU PEOPLE SHOULDN’T BE HERE!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I have to work somehow.”

    Customer: “GET OUT! YOU ARE TOO DISABLED TO WORK!”

    Coworker: “Ma’am, she is one of the smartest people I know!”

    Customer: “Bull-s***! You people are stupid! You are in wheelchairs, and drool out of your mouths!”

    (All of a sudden the customer GRABS me by my shirt, and tries to pull me out of the counter. My friend tries to free me.)

    Customer: “GET OUT! GET OUT! YOU’RE KILLING THE MARKET! GET OUT!”

    (After three minutes of useless attempts to free me, my friend calls mall security. The yelling customer is dragged away, and is banned for life.)

    Small Minded People

    | Scotland, UK | At The Checkout, Bigotry, Family & Kids

    (I am a dwarf, and need a stool to be seen clearly. From the till, I can pass as an average-height person. A customer and her small child approach.)

    Customer: “Do you have any woollen gloves?”

    Me: “Sure, we keep more stuff in the back. I’ll go and check for you.”

    (I step down from my stool, and come out from behind the counter. The customer is surprised, and takes a step back, taking her child’s hand. Despite being hurt by her reaction, I make myself smile. I head to the back room, where I can hear her son.)

    Child: “What was that, mum?”

    Customer: “Shush! Don’t stare. He’s just a midget; he won’t hurt you. He didn’t eat his greens, that’s all.”

    (I come back through with a box of gloves.)

    Me: “Sorry, I couldn’t help overhearing. Midget isn’t the most ‘PC’ term to use. Personally, I prefer dwarf; it’s different for everyone. Midget is definitely offensive for most though.”

    (The customer looks at me wide-eyed, saying nothing. I gesture to the box for her to look through.)

    Me: “You’ll probably find something in there. We have quite a lot of—”

    Customer: “Is it okay if you go back behind the counter? You know, for my son?”

    (Quite speechless, I go back behind the counter, and on to the stool. My manager decides to intervene.)

    Manager: “Is there a problem here? Do you think [my name] here is going to taint your kid’s innocence or something?”

    Customer: “I just don’t want him scaring my son. Is that too much to ask?”

    Manager: “Well, I’m not going to have you insult my staff. Either treat him like a human being, or leave this shop.”

    Customer: “Well, I don’t know why you hired someone like him to work on the till!”

    Manager: “Okay, that’s it. Get out.”

    (The customer and her child leave.)

    Me: “Thank you!”

    Manager: “Shush, just stay there. I’m going to the bakery to get you an apple turnover. You deserve something after dealing with her!”

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