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    Category: Bigotry

    This category is dedicated to the bottom rung of humanity at its worst — racists, homophobes, and other bigots — and, occasionally, employees at their finest.

    Dealing With Racists Can Be Ownerous

    | Fort Worth, TX, USA | Bigotry, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month, Top

    (I am eating dinner at a cafeteria. I see a waitress being incessantly berated by an elderly woman.)

    Waitress: “May I help you to your table, ma’am?”

    Customer: “Just listen to that redneck accent!”

    Waitress: “I grew up in Texas, Ma’am. Many of us—”

    Customer: “It’s still WHITE TRASH TALK!”

    (The waitress keeps her composure, and helps the elderly woman to her table. The customer starts talking to her grown-up children at the table.)

    Customer: “She is a no-class nothing! White trash! That’s all she is!”

    (The waitress finally takes a deep breath, and walks up to the elderly woman’s table.)

    Waitress: “You’re calling me white trash. Do you know that I own this franchise?”

    (The elderly woman’s eyes narrow at her, as though trying to figure out if she is lying or not.)

    Waitress: “If you’ll look at that plaque, that’s mine. It says I own this franchise. And, ma’am, you need not come back here again.”

    Stamping Her Place In History

    | Kill Devil Hills, NC, USA | Bigotry, History, Theme Of The Month

    (A male customer comes into my post office. I am a female, as are all but one clerk here. The customer asks me for a stamp. My partial book is a Rosa Parks stamp; I hand him one. He becomes enraged.)

    Customer: “A woman?! Don’t you have a picture of a cat or a dog, instead? A woman! I don’t even know who this person is! I will not use a woman!”

    (I act calm, but I am furious.)

    Me: “This woman is Ms. Rosa Parks. She worked for the freedom and equality of all people, of every color. She is one of the people who made sure people of every race are welcome here. And she did it all without any acts of violence.”

    (He takes his stamp. He sees my fury, and backs down pretty fast. Surprisingly, he became a very gentlemanly customer after that.)

    Her Point Has No Weight

    | Los Angeles, CA, USA | Bigotry, Health & Body, Theme Of The Month

    (I am working the reference desk. I have a great rapport with our patrons, and am often complimented for my positive attitude.)

    Me: “This is the reference desk. How can I help you?”

    Patron: “Can you tell me why fat people are so defensive?”

    Me: “I’m sorry?”

    Patron: “Can you tell me why fat people are so defensive?”

    Me: “I can find you some materials on obesity, or prejudice faced by obese people perhaps—”

    Patron: “I just want to know why fat people are always so angry.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am; I don’t think I can answer your question.”

    Patron: “See! You’re angry!”

    Me: “I’m sorry; do I know you?”

    Patron: “No, but I’ve been in your library before, and I recognize your voice. You’re fat. Why are you so angry?”

    Me: “Ma’am, I consider your question offensive and bigoted. Would you ask that same question about a particular ethnic group?”

    Patron: “You’re a f******* fat b****!”

    (I’d like to say this conversation didn’t shake me, but I felt ashamed of my appearance for the rest of the day.)

    Not Painting A Pretty Picture Of Himself

    | BC, Canada | Bigotry, Home Improvement, Theme Of The Month

    (Note: I am female.)

    Me: “Hi there! Is there anything I can give you a hand with?”

    Customer: “Yes, can I speak with your boss?”

    (He points to my coworker, who is a middle-aged gentleman. He has worked here longer than me, but he is not my boss. My coworker hears the customer, comes over, and pats my shoulder.)

    Coworker: “She’s the boss.”

    (The customer is suddenly outraged.)

    Customer: “How dare you! A woman in a hardware store! This blonde b**** probably doesn’t even know the first thing about paint!I want to talk to a man about man stuff!”

    Coworker: “Actually, she used to paint houses professionally before she went to college, and has more experience than anyone in this store when it comes to color theory and technique. She’s also assisted in completely gutting three houses and rebuilding them. That’s more than I could say I, or most of the men in this store, have done themselves.”

    Customer:Lies! Girls don’t f****** know anything about this s***! You’re a f****** liar!” *storms off*

    The Homo Critical Are Hypocritical

    | Quakertown, PA, USA | Bigotry, Rude & Risque, Theme Of The Month

    (Three men walk in at the same time to the adult bookstore where I work. Customer #1 heads straight for the lesbian porn. Customers #2 and #3 are regulars, and they are a couple. They have specially ordered certain items, and are there to pick them up.)

    Me: “Hey, guys! I have your order in the back. Let me go get it!”

    (I disappear, but as I’m picking up their box of items, I hear shouting. I rush out front.)

    Customer #1: “Homosexuality is a sin! Read the f****** Bible!”

    Customer #2: “Sir, you’re yelling at us in a porn store, while holding a DVD of lesbian porn. You are just a hypocrite, and I don’t need to listen to you.”

    (Customer #2 grabs Customer #3′s hand, and they continue to walk around the store. Customer #1 turns red, but comes to me to check out.)

    Customer #1: “Can you f******* believe those f***?”

    Me: “I can, and you know what? I love them, and accept them for who they are. As for you, I don’t accept your hatred. Get the h*** out of my store.”

    (I take the DVD, put it into the return to shelf bin, and wait for him to leave. He starts screaming.)

    Customer #1: “I’m going to put you in your proper place as a woman!”

    (Customer #2 and #3 come over.)

    Customer #3: “She told you to leave. Either you leave on your own, or we’ll help you.”

    (Customer #1 turns pale, and runs out of the store.)

    Customer #1: “The f*** are gonna get me!”

    (I turn to the two regulars.)

    Me: “Would you like a free DVD?”

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