Featured Story:
  • Always Time For A Rhyme
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  • Category: Bad Behavior

    These Wheels Don’t Revolve Around You

    | Duluth, MN, USA | Bad Behavior, Top

    (A middle-aged customer approaches me. I’m helping an elderly customer who has fallen out of his wheelchair, back into his chair. I’m a small guy: about 5’6″ tall and 120lbs.)

    Middle-Aged Customer: “Hey, you!”

    Me: “I’ll be with you in a moment, miss.”

    (I continue struggling to help the elderly customer back into his wheelchair.)

    Middle-Aged Customer: “Help me now, d*** it! I’m in a hurry; he can f****** wait!”

    (I ignore her until I am able to get the elderly customer back in his wheelchair. I start checking to see if he is okay.)

    Me: “Are you sure you’re alright, sir?”

    (The middle-aged customer grabs my shoulder, pulling me to face her.)

    Middle-Aged Customer: “I said, NOW!”

    Elderly Customer: “Now listen here you b****! What the h*** gives you the right to talk to this young man—much less grab him—like that? He told you he’d help you in a minute. People like you are what’s wrong with the world. The world doesn’t revolve around you. Stop acting like a d*** child!”

    Middle-Aged Customer: *storms off*

    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 7

    | Auckland, New Zealand | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests

    (I am a customer at a supermarket. I am pushing a trolley with my baby in the child seat. My top is a similar colour to the staff uniform, but a very different style.)

    Customer: “Excuse me, where are the vitamin waters?”

    Me: “I don’t know. Did you look down the soft drink aisle?”

    Customer: “You aren’t going to show me?”

    Me: “No, why would I do that?”

    Customer: “It’s your job! I’m going to talk to the manager about you!”

    Me: “I don’t work here; I’m just shopping.”

    Customer: “Don’t you lie to me! I saw you put that milk back; you’re re-stocking shelves and you just don’t want to help me!”

    (A manager walks past. The customer grabs him and drags him over.)

    Customer: “This woman refuses to help me!”

    Manager: “She doesn’t work here, so she doesn’t have to. Can I help you?”

    Customer: “Of course she works here; she’s wearing your uniform! How dare you cover for her laziness! I’m reporting you to head office!”

    Manager: “Ma’am, look at her trolley; we don’t sell babies. She’s shopping; she does not work here. Can I help you?”

    Customer: “Oh! Um… sorry. I was looking for the vitamin waters… sorry…”

    Related:
    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 6
    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 5

    He’s Not Taking Lying, Lying Down

    | Norway | Bad Behavior, Liars & Scammers, Technology

    (I work as a second line support, mostly dealing with emails from clients. One client is so nasty to my first line phone-support coworker, that she just cannot deal with him anymore. She begs me to take the call.)

    Me: “Hi, this is [name]. I was told you had some questions about the legal binding of your contract, and therefore you were transferred to me. Would you please clarify what the issue is here?”

    Client: “THIS F****** CHICK ON THE PHONE SAID THERE WOULD BE A F****** FEE IF I CHANGE MY PHONE PROVIDER! SHE’S F****** LYING! I WAS NEVER INFORMED THAT THIS—”

    (He trails off and just screams profanities. I remain silent until he finally calms down.)

    Client: “…um, hello?”

    Me: “Yes, sir, I am still here. However, as we will not be able to resolve anything while you are screaming at me, I figured I’d wait until you were finished. Anyway, from what I’ve gathered, you are upset that cancelling your contract will result in a cancellation fee?”

    Client: “YES! I already changed provider, and you guys sent me the bill! I WAS NOT INFORMED!”

    Me: “Well, sir, did you receive your information text? It can sometimes be hard to get all the information from—”

    Client: “I DID NOT GET A TEXT! I WAS NOT INFORMED!”

    (I decide to pull up his actual contract, to check what information he actually received. I go quiet for a bit.)

    Client: “…um, hello?”

    Me: “Sir, I just pulled up your contract here. You are one of our few clients who actually got your contract from one of our sales reps, on paper. Normally, they are given electronically over email or text. But you got the full contract, complete with all the information about our terms, on paper. You wrote down your details yourself, and signed it. How were you not informed?”

    Client: “It did not say there were a cancellation fee!”

    Me: “Yes, it does. Right under where you put down the phone numbers you wanted the agreement for. Where it also says how long you have to stay with us before you can change provider without the fee.”

    Client: “But… I didn’t agree with that!”

    Me: “You filled out the contract, checked of the box that said you had read, understood, and agreed to our terms of agreement, and signed the document.”

    Client: “But… I didn’t read the terms of agreement!”

    Me: “But you signed that you did.”

    Client: “Well… but… You people should know that I was lying! I AM NOT PAYING THIS STUPID BILL!” *hangs up*

    All Fantasy Sales Are Final

    | Baltimore, MD, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Geeks Rule, Technology, Top

    (I am at the midnight release for the video game “Final Fantasy XIII” with my friends. I don’t have a console that can play the game, but the store lets people purchase the release event promotional posters beforehand. There is only one poster in the store, and I had bought it a few days earlier. I’m also friends with most of the staff who are working there, including the manager.)

    Customer: “Can I also buy that promotional poster?”

    Cashier: “I’m sorry, sir, but it has already been purchased.”

    Customer: “There is no way it’s been purchased; it’s still there on the wall.”

    Cashier: “It was purchased a week ago, but it just hasn’t been picked up yet.”

    Customer: “So, just sell it to me; you’ll make twice the money.”

    Cashier: “Sir, I can’t sell the poster, since it isn’t ours anymore.”

    Customer: “I will give you twice what the other guy paid.”

    (The customer is starting to get angry, so another cashier steps in.)

    Cashier #2: “Didn’t you hear her? We can’t sell it to you.”

    Customer: “Fine! If you won’t sell it to me, then I’ll just take it!”

    (Both the manager and I have heard this. I decide to get my poster before this man does, and I catch the manager’s attention. I also just happen to be dressed like Auron from ‘Final Fantasy X’. I jump from my spot in line, and draw my fake sword.)

    Me: “Now! This is it! Now is the time to choose! Die and be free of pain or live and fight your sorrow! Now is the time to shape your stories! Your fate is in your hands!”

    Customer: “What?”

    Me: “Don’t look to others for knowledge; this is your story.”

    Customer: “I get it, but you are not getting that poster before I do!”

    Me: “Every story must have an ending.”

    (While this is going on, the manager takes the poster down, and puts it behind the counter. The customer gets to the spot where the poster had been, and looks at me, surprised.)

    Customer: “How did you do that?”

    Me: “I’m Captain Basch!”

    (The customer stomps off angrily. The whole store gets a big laugh when I do actually pick up the poster.)

    Trapped On Mount Karma

    | UK | Bad Behavior, Geography, Health & Body, Top

    (We are having one of the coldest Easters in record. I work in an outdoors equipment shop, where we sell everything for use in outdoor activities, from hiking boots and tents to climbing gear and ice picks. I also volunteer for the UK’s mountain rescue. My manager and colleagues all know this, and are happy for me to go on calls.)

    Customer: “I’m looking for some hiking boots so I can go out in the snow.”

    Me: “Okay, sir, they are just over here.”

    (We walk over to where we display our boots. As he is looking, I get paged that my team is going out on a rescue.)

    Me: “Sorry, sir, I am afraid I have to go. I volunteer for mountain rescue, but one of my colleagues will assist you.”

    Customer: “What! How dare you! You shouldn’t trouble me just because some random people managed to get themselves hurt.”

    (The customer grabs onto my sleeve. My manager comes over, as he is aware of my needing to leave.)

    Manager: “Sir, please let my employee leave. I will help you personally, and we will give you some free walking socks for your inconvenience.”

    (I eventually leave, and my team performs our rescue. The casualty had hypothermia and a broken leg, but other than that was fine. A couple of days later, my team get another call-out. I bet you can’t guess who it was…)

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