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  • August Theme Of The Month: Best. Customer. Ever!

    Category: Bad Behavior

    Unhappy To Have Nothing To Complain About

    | PA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Bizarre

    (It is after dark and I am attending to a line of customers as we have had a pretty busy night due to the holidays. An older woman comes up to my register.)

    Me: “How are you today, ma’am?”

    Customer: *is quiet for a few moments before throwing her items onto the table* “Hello.”

    (I begin to scan her items all the while she makes numerous demands of how she would like everything bagged a certain way. I am pleasant and cheerful the entire time as she has caught me in a good mood.)

    Customer: “And see that you pack these together! Oh, and all the food in one bag. And make sure that box isn’t scratched!”

    Me: “Oh course. That’s no problem!”

    (I smile and continue to pack her things. There is a long pause.)

    Customer: *in a sharp and sarcastic tone* “Well, you sure are… chipper and rather fast today.”

    Me: *I smile* “Oh, I try to be! I’ve been here so long this job just comes as second nature.”

    Customer: “Well, see that you stop that! You’re going too fast for me! And stop being so happy!”

    Me: “… I’m sorry?”

    (The woman walks off as I am left stunned.)

    Coworker: “Did you really just get yelled at for being too nice?! Now I’ve seen it all!”

    Picture Perfect Racism

    | Thunder Bay, ON, Canada | Bad Behavior, Bigotry

    (To generate more sales, we offer the customers a deal where, if they purchase $50 worth of extra sheets, they can purchase a full session CD for $89.99, which is regularly $250. The customer I am working with is First Nations, as I live in a community with a large Native population.)

    Me: “So with this coupon, if you spend over $50 in extra merchandise, you can upgrade your CD for $89.99 if you’d like!”

    Customer: “Not interested.”

    Me: “Okay, not a problem. We’ll continue looking through your photos.”

    (This goes on for some time while the customer’s two children, aged four and six, run around the studio lobby screaming and knocking things over. The customer finally puts the four-year-old girl in the uncomfortable looking mall stroller, where she promptly begins to scream in my ear. I continue with the sale.)

    Me: “In this shot I felt like the kids were very posed, it has nice smiles from both of them though.”

    Customer: “It’s ugh… Ugh! They’re all ugly! Why didn’t you take pictures of my kids like that! *gestures to stock photos on the wall of a little girl dancing around*

    Me: “Generally the sessions that these types of pictures come from are sessions that start in the morning and last all day with corporate level photographers.”

    Customer: “Whatever…”

    (The little girl next to me is still screaming as her brother is banging away on the other computer’s keyboard. I pause so that the mother could intervene with the noise and turn slightly towards the girl to indicate why I’ve stopped. As I turn I see that the girl has raised her skirt, showing clearly soiled underwear that are the cause of her distress.)

    Customer: “Hey! Don’t you f****** look at her! You f****** pervert!”

    Me: “Sorry. I thought you might want to calm her down.”

    Customer: “She’s my f****** daughter; I’ll do what I want! Don’t tell me how to raise my f****** kids, you white devil b****!”

    Me: “I wasn’t trying to say—”

    Customer: “I’M the customer. You pay attention to ME! GOT IT?!”

    (Gritting my teeth, I continue with the sale. When she starts to order sheets, I realize she’s going to be buying almost $50 worth.)

    Me: “If you buy one more sheet you’re over the $50 mark and you qualify for our CD deal! $89.99 for the full session, a savings of $170!”

    Customer: “I’m. Not. Interested.”

    Me: “Okay, I just wanted to make sure you didn’t want to take advantage of this awesome deal.”

    Customer: “Seriously! Give it up! You just want more of my f****** money! You think I’m stupid, b****? ‘Cause I’m not!” *mumbles under her breath* “Stupid f****** white girl.”

    (Finally the sale is coming to a close, and as I go to get up and go to the till, the customer stands up, and turns around.)

    Customer: “So, I get all those images on the CD for free, right? Because I bought more than $50 with that coupon?”

    Me: “No. I said you could get them for $89.99, which you refused three three times.”

    Customer: “LIAR! You f****** lying white racist b****! You just don’t want to give me the free stuff because I’m Native! RACIST! RACIST!” *pointing at me as she yells*

    (All the commotion has attracted the attention of the photographer in the back room, who comes out to see what the matter is.)

    Photographer: “What’s going—”

    Customer: “This f****** white girl is trying to rip me off because she’s racist!”

    Photographer: *looks at me and then back at the customer* “I somehow doubt that, but let me see if I can find you a better deal.” *gets out paper, pencil and a calculator*

    (After a few minutes the photographer concedes defeat.)

    Photographer: “The deal you’re being offered is the best deal we can offer you, so unless you want to take that deal, you won’t be getting the full CD.”

    Customer: “You’re a f****** racist, too! You’re all f****** RACISTS!”

    Photographer: “You do realize that by assuming she’s racist because she’s white, and calling her various names pertaining to the colour of her skin, YOU are in fact being the racist?”

    Customer: “Nice try! Only white people can be racist! Like the two of you!”

    Photographer: “… I’m just going to let you know that my father is African Canadian, so by all accounts, I’m not ‘white.’ That’s just the colour my skin leads more towards.”

    Customer: “Oh, um… I didn’t…”

    (Wordlessly I walk up to the till so that the customer can pay for her photos before she leaves.)

    Me: “Okay, have a nice day!”

    Customer: “F*** you, you racist s***! Just because she’s black doesn’t mean you can treat me like s***!”

    (The customer finally leaves. When she returned to pick up her photos she acted like nothing happened. Three years later, we still tell the story about her and her crazy attitude when we all need a laugh.)

    Paying Dearly

    | AR, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Wild & Unruly

    (I am working my second day as a cashier when an elderly customer walks up with a bundle of bananas and a drink.)

    Me: “Hello, sir, and welcome to [Store]. Would you like me to match the price of these bananas, dear?”

    Customer #1: “No, godd*** it!”

    Me: “Okay. Not a problem. I apologize. Would like to donate anything to [Charity We Support]? ”

    Customer #1: *turns away and mutters something*

    Me: “Was that a yes or…”


    Me: *all smiles* “I’m so sorry, sir. Not a problem.”

    Customer #1: “I am so f****** tired of your s***, you little b****! The people here are so godd*** stupid. Quite smiling. Your job f****** sucks.”

    (He walks off cursing under his breath.)

    Me: *turning to the next customer* “Hello, dear. How ar—”

    Customer #1: *rushing back* “And don’t call people dear, you little tramp! I’m old enough to be your d*** grandfather and she’s a woman, you f****** lesbian!”

    (At this point, I’m almost in tears because it’s my second day ever and I’ve had nothing but positive responses all day. My current customer speaks up.)

    Customer #2: “Don’t listen to that old b******, honey. You’re doing great and can call me whatever you like. Now, how much can I donate to that charity you were askin’ about?”

    Leaving Your Luggage Baggage Behind

    | Kansas City, MO, USA | Bad Behavior, Tourists/Travel

    (I work at one location of the world’s largest retail chain. My department carries luggage, furniture, lamps, and photo frames. Although known for a lower-class clientele, my particular store was in an affluent suburb. A woman comes in and approaches for help with duffel bags.)

    Me: “I’ll be happy to help you with that. They are right over here with our luggage. Are you looking for any specific features?”

    Customer: “It’s going to be an airline carry on, so it can’t be too big, and I’ll need to carry it around a lot, so it has to ride well on my shoulder.”

    (I point out the bags that fit the carry on restrictions. There are six. She proceeds to take the paper and inflatable stuffing out of all six and walk up and down the aisle with each. Then she picks one.)

    Customer: “I’m going to take this one. Thank you.”

    (She looks down at the pile of trash she left littered up and down the aisle.)

    Customer: “Looks like you won’t be bored for a while.” *she leaves*

    Don’t Kick A Pink Gift Horse In The Mouth

    | UK | Bad Behavior, Bigotry, Family & Kids

    (It’s nearly closing time, when a mother comes in with her son, who looks to be about two or three.)

    Boy: “I want a dolly! Look mummy!” *takes doll off shelf*

    Mother: “No, that’s for girls. Let’s go look at the Lego.”

    Boy: *points at box of pink Lego* “This one, mummy! Please!”

    Mother: “You can’t have pink, that’s a girl’s colour.”

    Boy: “I get horsey?” *points at pink toy horse*

    Me: “I love horseys. That seems like a great idea. It’s always lovely to see a handsome young man like you who likes pink horseys. Is that okay with you, Ma’am?”

    Mother: “You’re trying to turn my son gay!”

    Me: “I can assure you that I am not attempting anything like that.”

    (I walk away to allow the mother to pick out a ‘suitable’ toy for her son. They walk up to the cash desk with a toy car set, but the boy is crying.)

    Me: “That’ll be £23, please.”

    Boy: “Want horsey!”

    Me: “Since you’re such a cutie, how about a free horsey?”

    (I took a cheap pink horse from a shelf and handed it to him.)

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