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    Category: Bad Behavior

    His Assumption Is Not On The Money

    | West Allis, WI, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Criminal/Illegal, Money

    (I’m a legal secretary at a law firm, and I answer a call.)

    Me: “Hello, this is [Law Firm]. My name is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

    Caller: “Hi. You guys handle bankruptcies, right?”

    Me: “Yes, we do.”

    Caller: “Oh good. So, I think I need to file bankruptcy…”

    (The caller explains his financial situation.)

    Me: “Okay, I can go ahead and schedule an appointment with an attorney for a free consultation if you’d like.”

    Caller: “Yes, let’s do that. I just have a question, though. What would the cost be?”

    Me: “It would be [attorney's fee] plus costs.”

    Caller: “And I pay that after it’s all finished, right? I don’t pay anything up front?”

    Me: “Actually, you have to pay one-third of the fee up front.”

    Caller: “What! But I just explained that I have no money! That’s the whole point! Why do I have to pay up front?”

    Me: “Well, because if we allowed that, then clients would just cut and run once the bankruptcy is concluded, and we end up paying the cost of the case ourselves. It’s happened too many times before. It’s just our policy now.”

    Caller: *trying to sound sweet* “It’s such a shame that a few bad apples have ruined the process for everyone else.”

    Me: “Yes, it really is.”

    (Long pause.)

    Caller: “So, can I pay after the bankruptcy is concluded?”

    Me: “… No.”

    Caller: “D*** it! What’s the point?!” *hangs up*

    Retort Against Those Who Extort

    | Orlando, FL, USA | Awesome Workers, Bad Behavior, Home Improvement, Liars & Scammers, Top

    (My mother is in her 70s, and is shopping at a thrift store when she spots a beautiful bamboo bookcase.)

    Clerk: “Hi. Do you need some help?”

    Mom: “I am interested in the shelf, but have to go home first and do some measuring.”

    Clerk: “No problem; I’ll make sure it’s still here when you get back.”

    (After getting home, measuring, and seeing it will fit, she calls me to ask if I can go with her to pick it up if it was still there. We get to the store, where she walks over to the bookshelf and shows me. About a second later, a customer immediately walks up to us.)

    Customer: “I’m actually buying this shelf… but how much would you be willing to give me NOT to buy this?”

    (My mom and I looked at each other in disbelief, and before I can even think of what to say to this idiot, the clerk from earlier immediately steps in:)

    Clerk: “Sorry, sir. This lady was here earlier and was going to buy it, but she had to run home and take measurements first.”.

    Customer: “Well, that’s not fair. I was just ready to buy this!”

    Clerk: “Sorry. She gets first pick.”

    Mom: *looking at the customer with a big grin* “And I decided I’ll take it.”

    Clerk: *with an even bigger grin* “Let me go ahead and ring you up, and you also get a senior discount!”

    (We spent the next few minutes cashing out while the customer just stood there and stared at us the whole time, and then stood out in the parking lot and kept staring at us (with a butt-hurt look) while I loaded it on the car, pausing here and there to give him a big ‘f*** you’ grin. Thank you, awesome clerk, for putting that a**-hole in his place for trying to extort money from the elderly!)

    Wallet Walkabout

    | Sydney, NSW, Australia | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Criminal/Illegal, Money

    (I work in a store with four departments, each with their own checkout counter. A woman approaches my counter and asks to make a payment on a layby. I ask if there is anything else she needs. I have a funny feeling about her.)

    Customer: “No, just this. I’ll be leaving now.”

    (I watch her leave, then get to a point and turn into a tight aisle of fabric which is better accessed from the other side. I walk up to her.)

    Me: “Is there anything else I can help you with today?”

    Customer: *eyes wide with shock* “I, umm, oh, I don’t know what it is… I haven’t touched it.” *quickly leaves*

    (I look down to find a ladies wallet in the rolls of fabric. I take it to my counter and page for the owner a couple of times. I then get stuck serving customers for 10 minutes before I take it over to the office. I pass by the fabric counter as I do.)

    Me: *to a coworker* “Is there anyone in the office? I have found a wallet.”

    Coworker: “Where did you find that? We’ve been looking for it. I was serving a customer who put it on the counter, went to pay, and it was gone.”

    Me: “Really?”

    Coworker: “Yes, and the woman who was behind her in the line left suddenly as we noticed. We both asked where she was going and I stopped her to ask if she had seen the wallet. She told me no. Then I watched as she went around the back of your department and you served her. I just figured she had forgotten something.”

    Me: “I had a funny feeling so followed her. She pretty much led me to where the wallet was hidden. *takes coworker to the spot*

    Coworker: “This is right where I stopped her. She must have thrown it into the fabric, the b****!”

    (We had no real proof but the woman was lucky that we didn’t report it as her layby contained her name and address. The other customer was so happy to have the wallet returned intact!)

    A Continuous Sauce Of Stress, Part 2

    | NC, USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Money

    (I work in a restaurant where we make the majority of our food in-house, down to dressings and sauces. The menu says in at least two places that extra sauces are available for 50 cents. Three women sit at my table.)

    Woman #1: “I want to try a couple of these sauces.” *indicating our buffalo style sauces*

    Me: “Well, ma’am, we generally don’t do that. I may have to charge you 50 cents”

    Woman #1: “We’ve done it before. And I need some celery to dip in the sauces.”

    (Rather than putting up a fight I bring her two sauces and a couple of sticks of celery. Woman #1 gets 10 wings in one of the sauces she tried. When the wings come out…)

    Woman #1: “I need some extra sauce for my wings.”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am, that’s 50 cents extra. Is that okay?”

    Woman #1: “It’s not extra cause I don’t have enough sauce on my wings.”

    Me: “I’m sorry that you don’t feel the kitchen didn’t give you enough, but I’ll have to charge you 50 cents to get you more.”

    Woman #2: “That’s bad customer service! The customer is always right!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I apologize but I’m just doing my job the way I was taught to do it, and the menu says that extra sauces cost extra.”

    Woman #1: “Bring me the manager!”

    (My manager visits the table, offers to re-toss her wings in the kitchen but she just insists on having extra sauce brought to her without wanting to pay. My manager brings her half of a ramekin of sauce as a compromise but tells me that anything else they order will be extra. The women are grumpy for the rest of their meal and request a to go box toward the end.)

    Woman #2: *holding her ramekin of blue cheese dressing* “I need another container.”

    Me: “An empty container?”

    Woman #2: “No, with extra blue cheese.”

    Me: “That’ll be 50 cents. Is that okay?”

    Woman #2: “No! Its not like I want extra because I ate it all. I just want extra to go!”

    Me: “I’m sorry; ma’am, but extra dressings are 50 cents…”

    (She turned it down and their checks did not include any extra dressing charges. The women berated me more anyway, asked me if I was new, and asked where the ‘other girl’ they had before was. The girl they described to me had actually been recently fired. One lady asked for change for a dollar, which I gave her, and left two quarters on the table with a note that said ‘Customer service goes toward your tip. Here’s your 50 cents.’ Sorry, giving out free stuff isn’t part of my job, lady!)

    Related:
    A Continuous Sauce Of Stress

    Building Up Abuse About The Building

    | Chicago, IL, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Top

    (I work as maintenance coordinator for a property management company. I get a call from a nearly 30-year-old tenant’s mother.)

    Me: “Hello, This is [My Name]. How can I help—”

    Mother: “You listen here. I am going to sue the living s*** out of you and you negligent company unless you fix the issues in my son’s apartment!”

    Me: “I’ll do everything I can. What is the—”

    Mother: “Well, YOU have already been doing ALL that YOU can. Maybe I need to talk to someone else, cause all you can do is f*** all!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m more than happy to assist you in any way I can but I will stop this conversation if you continue to be abusive. What is the add—”

    Mother: “I’M BEING ABUSIVE?! You take my money EVERY MONTH so my son can live in that s***-hole! Breathing in mold, dealing with rats and roaches! WHAT ABOUT THE GOD-D*** HOLE IN THE CEILING?! Don’t you think that’s abusive!?”

    Me: “Ma’am, I have no knowledge of any unit having any of these problems but for me to help I need the address—”

    Mother: “YOU HAVE NO F****** KNOWLEDGE?! LET ME TALK TO YOUR MANAGER!”

    (At this point I lose my patience.)

    Me: “Ma’am, did you sign the lease for your son or were you present for the signing of the lease?”

    Mother: “No, I did not, but what the h*** does that have to do with anything?”

    Me: “It MEANS I legally do not have to talk you. NO ONE here has to, and if you continue to be this abrasive on the phone, I will advise the property manager to evict your adult son from his unit. I DON’T WANT TO DO THAT! Now, PLEASE, if you want me to help I need the ADDRESS!”

    Mother: “Fine, it’s [address].”

    Me: “Ma’am, we don’t even manage that building. It’s managed by [Other Management Company].”

    Mother: “Well, then, how do I get ahold of them?”

    Me: “Let me Google that for you. ” *hangs up phone*

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