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    Category: Bad Behavior

    Time For A Tea-V

    | UK | Bad Behavior, Movies & TV, Technology

    (I am manning the phones late on a Saturday afternoon.)

    Me: “Good afternoon, [TV service]; how can I help you?”

    Caller: “The TV’s gone wrong. There will be somebody in at six to fix it. The football’s on tonight.”

    Me: “Sorry, sir, we cannot get anybody out until Monday.”

    Caller: “You have gotta be f****** joking. You advertise 24-hour service.”

    Me: “We have a 24-hour answering service to take the details. Repairs are carried out from 8 am until 6 pm, Monday through to Saturday.”

    Caller: “Look, c***! Get somebody round my house now, or I’ll come round there and smash your f****** face in!”

    Me: “Sorry, sir, I can’t help.”

    Caller: “Okay ‘boy’, put me through to your boss. I want to talk to the organ grinder, not the monkey.”

    (The boss is in the office with me, and has heard my half of the conversation. My boss picks up the phone, and puts it in speaker mode.)

    Boss: “Good evening, sir. How can I be of assistance?”

    Caller: “Your f****** ‘TEA BOY’ has told me I can’t get my TV fixed today!”

    Boss: “The f****** tea boy is absolutely correct.”

    (My boss puts the phone down on the caller, cutting him off in mid-flow of swear words. He looks over and smiles.)

    Boss: “That’s the way to handle them. Now, how about a cup of tea now that you have been promoted?”

    You Reap What You Soy

    | DE, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Health & Body

    (I’m a regular customer standing in line at my favorite coffee shop. It’s a busy morning, and the very friendly barista I know is flying through orders. Customer #1 is ahead of me waiting.)

    Barista: “I have a large latte for [Customer #1].”

    Customer #1: “Is that soy? I asked for soy.”

    Barista: “Oh no, it’s not. I apologize; the cup was not marked properly. I’m glad you checked.”

    Customer #1: “I have a severe dairy allergy. It was supposed to be soy.”

    Barista: “Well I do apologize; I’ll start another right away. We always say ‘soy’ when the coffee contains soy, so thanks for checking.”

    Customer #1: “I don’t need your attitude!”

    Barista: “I did not mean to give you any attitude, ma’am. Again I apologize. In fact, I have a diary allergy myself, so I understand. Here’s your tall latte with soy.”

    (I can tell that everyone around me is feeling uncomfortable witnessing Customer #1′s bad behavior. She starts to leave with her coffee, and turns to Customer #2.)

    Customer #1: “What a b****!”

    Customer #2: “You sure act like one!”

    (At this, the remainder of the customers shout statements of agreement.)

    Remainder Of Customers: “Yeah! Way to be a nasty person over a little mistake! Poor girl is just doing her job, and she’s hustling through it too! I would never want to have to put up with you! You really ought to be nicer to people who serve you your food!”

    (Customer #1 practically runs from the store. It gives me a little more faith in humanity!)

    Classic Banking Withdrawal Symptoms

    | USA | Bad Behavior, Bizarre, Food & Drink

    (My bank offers free cookies to our customers to thank them for banking with us. Most people are polite and only take one cookie, two at the most for someone else waiting at home. One customer is notorious for going to all her local branches and taking every single cookie by dumping them in a grocery bag. Today, a coworker has just finished waiting on her while I am finishing up with a customer.)

    Me: “Is there anything else we can help you with today?”

    Customer: “Yes, what kind of cookies do you have?”

    Me: “We have peanut butter and chocolate chip. They are in a basket by the door on your way out; please help yourself!”

    (My customer heads over. Unfortunately, she’s right behind the other notorious customer with the grocery bag in her hand. He watches as the other customer picks up handful after handful of cookies and shoves them into her grocery bag and leaves, the basket now empty.)

    Me: *to my next customer* “Oh my God. I’m so sorry, sir. We just finished making a fresh batch. Would you like one or two?”

    Next Customer: *laughing* “No, no thank you. I guess it’s a sign that I don’t really need a cookie today!”

    Way Out Of Line

    | Los Angeles, CA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Criminal/Illegal, Wild & Unruly

    (I work at a high end clothing store that’s having a massive sale. Even with all five checkouts open, the line of customers is still nearly 30 people long. I’m working on restocking some shirts when I see a pair of young girl customers cut to the front of the line directly in front of another customer.)

    Customer: “Ladies, I’m sorry, but there is a line.”

    Girl #1: “Man, why do you care if we cut? It’s just one purchase; you can stand to wait a few more minutes.”

    Customer: “That wouldn’t be fair to the people behind me. Please go to the back of the line.”

    Girl #2: “F*** you! You little punk-a**! If my girl wants to cut in front of you, then you can’t stop her.”

    (Sighing, the customer calls to one of my coworkers.)

    Customer: “Can you please escort these ladies to the back of the line?”

    Coworker: “I’m sorry, ladies, but you do have to move to the back, and I’m going to have to ask you to tone down your language.”

    Girl #1: “Man, f*** this! This b****-a** just don’t want to help me.”

    (Both of them turn back to the customer.)

    Girl #1: “This is all your fault you gay mother-f*****!”

    (At this, both girls swing at the customer, punching him in the face and neck.)

    Customer: *wincing* “Well, that would probably count as battery, and maybe even assault. Are there any more crimes you want to commit before you get kicked out?”

    Girl #2: “Oh, big f****** man, hiding behind some b****-a** cops because you’re scared to fight.”

    (Girl #2 punches the customer in the face again, only to be sent flying about five feet from a single palm thrust to the stomach from the man. The two girls end up calling the police to report the customer for attacking them. Unfortunately for them, our store cameras are quite good, and pick up the entire preceding conversation and their initial assault. The police officer even offers to arrest the girls for attacking the customer. Luckily for them, he decides it is too much trouble dealing with them.)

    Teach Them The Ways Of The Dark-Ale Side

    | England, UK | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Theme Of The Month

    (I’m picking up my daughter from nursery, and overhear a conversation with one of the other parents and a member of staff.)

    Parent: “Tell her what mommy is going to do tonight.”

    Two-Year-Old: “Mummy is going to the bar and getting pissed!”

    Staff: “Err…”

    Parent: “Isn’t it funny!?”

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