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    Category: Bad Behavior

    When The Customer Gets Tough, They Have To Get Going

    | Ridgewood, NJ, USA | Bad Behavior, Wild & Unruly

    (We close at 9 on Sunday nights. At about 8:15, a customer calls and says she has a few items to return, and will be in shortly. She shows up at 8:45 and dumps $60 worth of stuff on the service desk.)

    Customer: “You just do my return and I will grab a few things and come back here.”

    Me: “Okay, but be advised we close in 15 minutes and I am going to need your ID and signature because this is going to be over $25.”

    (I make the 15-minute closing announcement. The customer walks away, ignoring me. I ring in the return, make the 10-minute, 5-minute, and closing announcements, then go walking through the store trying to find this woman. I finally find her in the very last aisle, with a cart FULL of groceries.)

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry, but we are now closed. We’ve been closed for five minutes at this point. You’re going to have to stop at the desk, sign for your refund, and head to the register because I and my cashier would like to go home.”

    Customer: “YOU CAN’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO. I AM THE CUSTOMER—”

    Me: “Ma’am, I can. And the laws in this county say YOU. NEED. TO. GO.”

    (She then made some ungodly noise, almost ran me over with her cart, snatched then signed the refund form, and stalked her way up to the register… all the while complaining about how rude I was because she was so important and this was the only time she had to go grocery shopping. Once she finally left, my cashier told me she said ‘that little b***h is lucky I’m not 10 years younger because I would have kicked her a** for making me leave.’)

    Gunning For That Sale

    | USA | Bad Behavior, Criminal/Illegal, Politics

    (I have been working with this customer for a little over an hour and a half. He picks out his rifle, ammo, cleaning kit, scope – the whole nine yards. I am excited because we get commission on what we sell. We finally get to the point where we fill out paperwork, background check, etc.)

    Me: “Okay, sir. Now that we have everything ready, if you can, please let me see your ID so we can get the paperwork started?”

    Customer: “No, I don’t need to do paperwork.”

    Me: *thinking he’s joking, I laugh*

    (Awkward silence.)

    Customer: “So… are you gonna ring me up?”

    Me: “You need to fill out the paperwork so I can perform a background check first.”

    Customer: “Look, I’m a police officer. I don’t need to do the paperwork.”

    Me: “Uh, yes, you do. Everyone needs to do paperwork for a firearm purchase, even the president.”

    Customer: “I don’t give a s*** about the president. Now, are you going to sell me the rifle or not?”

    Me: “Are you going to fill out the paperwork?”

    Customer: “Nope. *turns and leaves*

    Me: *screams internally*

    (He came back the next day trying to buy the same rifle but with another employee. I told him the story from the day before. He told the customer to leave. Never saw him again.)

    Reading The Smoke Signal Loud And Clear

    | Columbus, OH, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Bad Behavior

    (I’m working third-shift in a quiet part of town, when a car pulls up, a man steps out, walks in, and comes up to the counter.)

    Customer: “Pack of Marlboro Reds.”

    Me: “Sure thing. May I see your ID?”

    Customer: “What?”

    Me: “Your ID. I need to see it before I can sell you cigarettes.”

    Customer: “Are you f****** kidding me?”

    Me: “…no, sir. I need to see ID before I can sell you cigarettes.”

    Customer: “Look, I know this is a s***ty little town, but in a real city like Cleveland, they don’t ask people older than 18 for ID for just cigarettes.”

    Me: “Sir, I doubt that. I’m abiding by state law, and that applies in Cleveland, too.”

    Customer: “Just give me the smokes!”

    Me: “Sir, I can’t do that without ID.”

    Customer: “You know what? You’re just some dumba** kid who works a s***ty job, and you’ll never amount to anything because you live in this piece of s*** town. If you had a real job or weren’t a total loser, you wouldn’t be such a piece of s*** about this. You won’t ever be anything in life, you f***.”

    Me: “That might be true, but, you know what I can do that you can’t?”

    Customer: “WHAT?”

    (I turn, grab a pack of my brand of cigarettes off the shelf, scan them, pull out my wallet, swipe my card, grab my receipt, open the pack, and slide a cigarette behind my ear, before pocketing the smokes and receipt.)

    Me: “I can buy cigarettes here.”

    Customer: “F*** YOU!”

    (He turns and storms out.)

    Me: “Have a great mornin’!”

    An Attention Deficit Disorder

    | PA, USA | Bad Behavior, Criminal/Illegal

    (A patron grabs a pair of our headphones, puts them in her purse, and starts walking away.)

    Me: “Ma’am, you can’t take our headphones away from the computer area.”

    Patron: “Oh. I didn’t think you were paying attention, so I just took them. Is that okay?”

    Me: “…no. No, it isn’t.”

    Enough To Make You Cry

    | QC, Canada | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Health & Body

    (I work in a hotel restaurant. A group of clients have been notoriously difficult, sending back dishes more than once for small details. On a particularly busy night, a waiter walks back into the kitchen and asks about a meal.)

    Waiter: “Does this dish contain onions? The client says he’s deadly allergic.”

    (Hearing this, the chef panics and asks the waiter to bring him to the client.)

    Chef: “Sir, are you all right? Do you have any medicine for your allergy? I’ll call the ambulance right away!”

    (The client is confused and worried.)

    Client: “What? No, I don’t have medicine. Why?”

    Chef: “You told the waiter you were deadly allergic to onions. You should have mentioned it earlier. There were some in the soup.”

    Client: “…oh. I just don’t like onions.”

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