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    Category: Bad Behavior

    He Got BUS-ted

    | Sydney, NSW, Australia | Bad Behavior, Extra Stupid, Top, Transportation

    (I’m at the busiest train station in the state, waiting to get out of the station to grab some lunch whilst I wait for my train. I get stuck behind a man whose train ticket will not allow him to exit through the ticket gates.)

    Passenger: “Excuse me, my ticket isn’t working!”

    Employee: “Oh, can I see your ticket, please?”

    Passenger: “I bought this from a news agency. It’s supposed to work on all trains!”

    (The passenger hands the employee a pre-paid bus ticket.)

    Employee: “I’m sorry, sir, but this ticket won’t work here. This is not a train ticket.”

    Passenger: “But I bought it from a newsagent! It has to work!”

    Employee: “I don’t know what else to tell you, mate. This ticket will not work on this service, and you have wasted your money. I can let you through the gate, though, if you’ll just step back to let the gate open.”

    Passenger: “This is RIDICULOUS! This ticket is supposed to work! I used my hard-earned money on it! I spent Australian currency on this! Why isn’t it working?!”

    (There is now a very long line of irate people waiting for the man to just go through the now open gate. The employee is dumbfounded as to why the man won’t just leave. I lose my temper because I’m hungry and my train is to leave shortly, so I step in.)

    Me: “Dude. You bought the wrong ticket. That ticket is a bus ticket. Operative word: BUS. This is a train station.”

    Passenger: “I don’t care! I bought it and therefore it should work!”

    Me: “Yeah, it will work on a bus, but that brings us back to the original predicament: this is a train station, so your ticket will not work, no matter how much you harass people about it.”

    Passenger: “Nobody asked you, you little b****.”

    Me: “No, you’re right; nobody asked me. But I’m f****** hungry, and you are holding up a few dozen people. So please shut up, accept the fact that you screwed up, and get out of the way.”

    Passenger: “You’ve got a mouth on you, don’t you?”

    Me: “I do, and I’d like to fill it with food, so please get the f*** out of my way.”

    (The passenger storms off, and I ask the employee if she can keep the gate open for me as I don’t want my ticket to get rejected on the way back through. She lets me through, and I go to get some food and come back. As I come back to the gate, there is a security guard and another employee standing with the first employee. The security guard approaches me with a notepad.)

    Security Guard: “Excuse me, miss: I just have a question for you. Are you in any way affiliated with [rail company] as a contractor or employee?”

    Me: “No, I’m just trying to get to Woolongong to see a few friends.”

    Security Guard: *closes notepad and smiles* “Thanks for that. That guy you told off? He tried to file an official complaint against you. He wouldn’t believe [Employee] when she said you don’t work here.”

    Employee: “And thanks for that, by the way. Enjoy your trip to the coast!”

    Can’t Help Those Who Won’t Help Themselves

    | CA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Technology

    (The entire network for my store and the stores in my district have gone down, preventing us from looking up customer accounts and values for electronic devices. A customer comes in to have an estimate for selling an iPhone.)

    Customer: “How much can I get for this?”

    Coworker: “Our system is down right now, so unfortunately we cannot look it up.”

    Customer: “You can’t even try?”

    Coworker: “Well, let’s give it a shot.”

    (My coworker starts loading the screen, and the system only loads about halfway before failing.)

    Coworker: “Since it’s still not working, I can give you the number of another store that does have their system functioning so they can give you an estimate.”

    Customer: “So you mean I have to call them, and you can’t tell me here?”

    Coworker: “We cannot.”

    Customer: “Why not?”

    (I have just clocked off, but decide to interject to help explain the situation.)

    Me: “Our system is down, preventing us from looking up the estimate. However, this store can give you an estimate. Additionally, you can go onto our store website and find an estimate there.”

    Customer: “So you’re telling me you can’t help me?”

    Me: “Through our system we cannot, but I have provided you two alternatives to help you out.”

    Customer: *starts leaving* “Dumb-a** b****, won’t even help me out and look it up for me.”

    Another Customer: “Their system is down lady! Gosh, what is her problem?”

    Common Sense Bounces Off His Head

    | Rotherham, England, UK | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Criminal/Illegal

    (There have been a number of armed robberies in the surrounding area of betting shops, convenience stores and post offices. We are all pretty on edge when a customer comes in the store wearing a motorbike helmet.)

    Me: “Excuse me, could you remove your helmet please?”

    Customer: “What?!”

    Me: “Could you remove your helmet, please? You’re not supposed to come in the shop with it on.”

    Customer: “This is ridiculous; why should I have to take it off?”

    Me: “I’m not serving you while you have it on. Please remove it.”

    Customer: “If a [racial slur] came in here with their face covered, you wouldn’t ask them to remove it.”

    Me: “Seeing as that isn’t even relevant in this matter, I’ll ignore what you just said. However I will not serve you while you are wearing that helmet. There have been countless armed robberies in the area, so do you really think I feel safe with you walking in like that? Just be glad I haven’t already pressed the panic button.”

    Customer: *shuts up and removes helmet*

    To Give Credit Where Debit Is Due, Part 4

    | NC, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Extra Stupid, Money

    (I am helping a customer with a return. Due to past misuses of the system, our registers are set to only do returns in the original payment method, or as a store gift card.)

    Me: “Alright, ma’am, this was done as debit. I can either put it on a gift card, or back onto the same card, if you have it on you.”

    Customer: “What? Debit’s the same as cash! Why can’t I get cash?”

    Me: “I apologize, but that’s our policy. We can only do it in the method it was originally done, or store credit.”

    Customer: “Well that’s just wrong. Debit is the same as cash! Everywhere!”

    Me: “I understand, and I am sorry, but these are the only options I’m allowed.”

    Customer: *handing me her card* “Well fine, put it back on the card.”

    Me: *as I slide the card* “It may take one or two business days to show back up. Here’s your copy of the return, and I hope you have a nice day.”

    Customer: *reading her return receipt* “Hey! It says credit on here! I paid debit!”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am. The system has to credit it back to your card. It looks a little weird, but the money is going back.”

    Customer: “If I use credit, I’ll be fined! My card doesn’t do credit! That first receipt said debit!”

    Me: “Yes, the original purchase is definitely debit. Ma’am, it’s not charging your card; it’s crediting money back. I don’t know your particular bank, but there’s never been an issue—”

    Customer: “What is your name? If there’s a problem, I want to know. And give me that original receipt back. It says debit.”

    Me: “I’m [Name]. Give me just a second to copy some info off this receipt onto the return, and you’ll have it right back.”

    (At this point, the customer is fed up, and leaves without waiting for her original receipt. I staple it to the return, and turn to help the next customer. Several days later, the same customer approaches me.)

    Customer: “Hi. I was in here a couple of days ago, and you were helping me with a return. I… just wanted to apologize for the way I treated you. I was having a bad day, and I shouldn’t have taken it out on you.”

    Me: “Oh! Thank you! I take it the return processed as it should?”

    Customer: “Yes. But even if it hadn’t, there’s no excuse for the way I was acting.”

    Me: “Well, thank you. Everyone has a bad day now and then.”

    (Her making a point to return and say sorry was such a pleasant surprise; it improved the whole rest of my shift.)

    Related:
    To Give Credit Where Debit Is Due, Part 3
    To Give Credit Where Debit Is Due, Part 2

    A**-hole In One

    | TX, USA | Bad Behavior, Top, Wild & Unruly

    (I work at a golf course that is situated in a residential area. I am talking to a friend of mine who owns a home on the course when a ball lands in his backyard.)

    Golfer: “Move!” *hops the fence*

    My Friend: “Hey! This is private property; get out of here!”

    Golfer: “No it isn’t; I paid good money to play on this course and I am going to play through.”

    Me: “Actually, sir, it is private property.”

    Golfer: *not listening* “Why the h*** do you put such stupid obstacles in the way? What kind of course has fences so close to the green?”

    My Friend: “It isn’t an obstacle! It’s my fence, and you are in my backyard. Now beat it before I call the police.”

    Golfer: “Shut the f*** up; you’re throwing me off my game.” *turns to me* “Shouldn’t you escort him off the course? He isn’t showing any etiquette.”

    (At this point my friend gets irritated and has gone into his house.)

    Me: “He doesn’t have to show any etiquette; he owns the property. You are the one I will be escor—”

    Golfer: “No he doesn’t! The course owns all of this; how stupid are you?”

    (My friend comes back with a bucket of golf balls, and dumps them where the golfer’s ball has landed.)

    Golfer: “What the f*** are you doing! I’ll never find my ball!”

    My Friend: “Good.”

    Golfer: “I paid good money for that ball, and you’re stealing it! I am calling the police!”

    Me: “It landed in someone’s yard. It is clearly stated in the rule book that a residential area is out of bounds, so he can do whatever he wants with it.”

    Golfer: “Shut up! What do you know? You’re just some kid!”

    Me: “Sir, please come with me. You are not welcome here anymore.”

    Golfer: “No! I can do what I want! I paid good money to—”

    My Friend: “I spend all day cleaning up after a**-holes like you that think they can do whatever they want. They rammed their carts into my fence thinking it was a personal cart stopper, and I had to finally shell out $1,500 to buy a new one because it eventually fell down completely.”

    Golfer: “I didn’t—”

    My Friend: “People like you have stolen my stuff, left their trash in my yard, even though there is a bin right there next to the tee-box. They have killed my dog, and one of you pricks had the audacity to walk into my house and use my bathroom without even so much as asking.”

    Golfer: *stuttering* “But the course owns it; I’m allowed to—”

    My Friend: “No you’re not. My property line extends another twenty feet past the fence line; you are trespassing. I own this house, this yard, and everything in them.”

    (My friend picks him up, and tosses him over the fence.)

    Golfer: “That’s assault! I am calling the police on you! I paid good money!”

    My Friend: “I don’t give a d*** how much you paid; this is private property and according to the state penal code, I can remove you just like I did.”

    Golfer: “I’ll sue! I paid good money!”

    My Friend: “Go ahead; I’ll be your lawyer.”

    (One of the owners shows up and escorts the golfer off the golf course. He is banned from playing there again. My friend now plays free for his trouble.)

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