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    Category: Bad Behavior

    At Lagerheads, Part 3

    | Denver, CO, USA | Bad Behavior, Criminal/Illegal, Food & Drink, Hotels & Lodging

    (I work the night shift at an upscale long-term stay hotel. I am delivering all the bills underneath the doors when I encounter a guest holding two beers and a water from my market in the lobby. State law prohibits me from selling alcohol of any kind after midnight.)

    Guest: “Hi. Do you work here?”

    Me: “Yes, I do, sir. How may I help you?”

    Guest: “I just wanted to let you know, I got these from the market. I left a note to charge them to my room, 235.”

    Me: “I’m very sorry, sir, but I cannot charge those beers. I actually have to take them back, as I’m not allowed to sell alcohol after midnight.”

    Guest: “It’s not that long after midnight.”

    Me: “Sir, it’s almost two in the morning. It’s actually state law, not company policy, so my hands are really tied. Again, I’m sorry.”

    Guest: “Just charge them in the morning.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I really can’t do that. It’s because we sell the beer retail; we don’t serve it.”

    Guest: “This is ridiculous. I’m taking the beers. You can do it just this once. I won’t tell anyone.”

    Me: “Sir, I’m sorry. I have you on camera taking the beer. It would show up on my shift audit, which my manager reviews daily. If I let you take that I will lose my job.”

    Guest: “That’s not my problem; you should have been there when I was taking them out of the cooler.”

    Me: “Sir, if you don’t give me those beers, I’ll be forced to return to my desk and call the police.”

    Guest: “What?! Why?!”

    Me: “You didn’t pay for those beers, and you’re being very belligerent about breaking state law. I know your room number, which means I know your name and have a copy of your ID on file. I suggest you reconsider how thirsty you really are.”

    (He gave me the beers.)

    Related:
    At Lagerheads, Part 2
    At Lagerheads

    Rectify The Situation, Part 2

    | FL, USA | Bad Behavior, Health & Body

    (I regularly update medical records for our clients. One of my clients is getting angry that his case is taking so long, and has been yelling at me for a few minutes.)

    Client: “Yeah, well this is taking way too long. I bet you don’t even know that I had surgery last week!”

    Me: “Okay, sir, where did you have your surgery?”

    Client: “Up my rectum!”

    (There is a long and awkward silence.)

    Me: “Um, well, I meant at which hospital did you have your surgery, so that I can get your medical records?”

    Client: “…oh.”

    Related:
    Rectify The Situation

    Order(s) Out Of Disorder

    | CA, USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

    (It’s 8:30 pm on a very slow Monday night, so my manager has sent everyone home except me and another server. Suddenly, we get slammed. Within 20 minutes I have over 20 tables. While I’m doing my best, about half my tables still need to be greeted, much less have their orders taken.)

    Customer: “We need refills. It’s been like twenty minutes since you came over here last. We’re all done with our food and we’ve needed refills this whole time!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir; I’ll be back in one second with those refills, okay?”

    (I get the tables refilled, despite the fact that I have to ring in four other tables and check out three of them. Because I am so busy, I make a mistake and give him a regular soda like his friends instead of the diet soda he wants. After dropping them off and trying to attend to the outrageous amount of other guests needing me, he begins yelling for me.)

    Customer: “HEY! LADY! WE NEED YOU OVER HERE NOW!”

    (I look sympathetically at the couple I am currently taking the order for.)

    Me: “I am so sorry about this; I will be right back.”

    Couple: “Oh, don’t worry about it; we do understand. It’s crazy in here!”

    (I hastily run to the shouting customer. He shoves the cup against my chest, sloshing soda on me and the floor.)

    Customer: “Can I get a DIET soda this time? DIET? DI-ET, as in NOT REGULAR?”

    (The shouting customer’s wife has been looking embarrassed during the whole exchange. She suddenly pipes up.)

    Customer’s Wife: “SIT. DOWN!”

    (The customer sits immediately, fuming. I refill his diet soda quickly, trying to ignore the cold soda all over me.)

    Me: “Here you go, sir; I’m very sorry about that.”

    Customer’s Wife: “Thank you so much dear. Whenever you get a chance, we’d like the bill. Take your time.”

    (Trying not to cry, I take care of some other customers, including the poor couple I had to run away from, and then print their bill out. The husband does not look at me or talk to me again the rest of the time.)

    Customer’s Wife: “You were an amazing waitress, honey. Thank you.”

    (The wife left me a 30% tip, and the other couple dropped a $20 bill for my tip on top of their small, $20 tag.)

    A Fight Between Black-Felts

    | NY, USA | Bad Behavior, Top

    (I am a 17-year-old male. I’ve recently become interested in learning how to make stuffed animals. I decide to make a stuffed animal for my sister, and go to the local fabric store for some felt and materials.)

    Me: “Hi, can I get black, white, orange, and yellow felt please?”

    Cashier: “Of course! What for, if I may ask?”

    Me: “I’m going to attempt to make a stuffed animal for my sister; wish me luck!”

    Cashier: “Aw, that’s so sweet!”

    (The cashier hands me the black, white, and orange felt.)

    Cashier: “You’ve got the last black felt, but let me check to see if we have any more yellow.”

    (The cashier goes to the back. An elderly customer comes in, and snatches the black felt out of my hands.)

    Me: “Hey! I need that!”

    Elderly Customer: “No, you don’t. What would a stupid kid like you need this for?”

    Me: “I have my reasons. Can I please get that back?”

    Elderly Customer: “I need this more than you do. I bet you don’t even know how to sew; you’re a boy.”

    (The cashier comes back.)

    Cashier: “We’re all out of yellow, but we have—hey, why does she have the black felt?”

    Elderly Customer: “I need it more than this brat!”

    Me: “She grabbed it from me. Theoretically I could just cut up an old T-shirt or someth—”

    (The cashier snatches the felt from the woman.)

    Cashier: “Give me this.”

    Elderly Customer: “WHAT WOULD SOME TEENAGER NEED THAT FOR?!”

    Cashier: “He’s making a stuffed animal for his sister; now get out before I throw you out.”

    (The elderly customer grumbles and leaves.)

    Me: “Thank you so much.”

    Cashier: “Honestly, I don’t know why that woman keeps coming back. Good luck on your stuffed animal; come back and show it to me!”

    Me: “I’ll be sure to!”

    (The stuffed animal came out great; I hope my sister loves it!)

    Thinks He Is Customer Number One

    | Detroit, MI, USA | Bad Behavior, Movies & TV, Theme Of The Month, Top, Wild & Unruly

    (A customer comes in. While he is a regular, no one on staff cares for him, because he always acts like he should get special treatment.)

    Me: “Hi, [Customer]. How are you today?”

    Customer: “Fine, Here’s your movies.”

    (He throws them on the counter, and they scatter everywhere. I start picking them up.)

    Me: “These movies didn’t come from here. In fact they aren’t even from another one of the stores in our chain, but a completely different one.”

    Customer: “What do you mean? So I can’t return them here?”

    Me: “No, you’ll have to take them back to [Competitor].”

    Customer: “I don’t see why! Don’t you know how much money I spend here?”

    Me: “Actually, I do know you’re in here quite often, but I still can’t take movies from [Competitor].”

    (He argues with me for a while, and I try to calmly explain why I cannot take his movies. He continues to be belligerent, and knocks over other things that we have sitting on the counter.)

    Me: “Sir, I am going to have to ask you to leave.”

    Customer: “Fine! I’m leaving and taking my business elsewhere!”

    (As I watch him leave the store, instead of heading toward his car, he goes around to the part of the building facing the road and proceeds to urinate all over the windows. The entire store has huge windows, so after all the ruckus he caused, my staff and our customers in the store all see this. Everyone is in shock over this display. I start calling the police.)

    Me: “Yes, I would like to make a report on a man who exposed himself and urinated on our building… Why, yes, I do happen to have his name and his address…”


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