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    Category: Bad Behavior

    Misery In A Can

    | FL, USA | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

    (I’ve just finished stocking an end-cap of soup cans. It has taken me about 20 minutes to get them all lined up properly. As I’m walking away, a little boy of about six or seven comes charging up. He kicks the cans on the bottom shelf over, sending them flying everywhere. Then he grabs two and throws them, one hitting another customer in the shin and the other smashing right through a glass bottle of cheap wine.)

    Me: “HEY! What the heck are you doing, kid?!”

    Boy: “My mommy said I should go make someone else miserable for once!”

    Retired & Extremely Dangerous, Part 2

    | Birmingham, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Food & Drink, Money, Top

    (My dad and I have just checked out at the supermarket. There are two elderly ladies pushing shopping carts in front of us. They are walking slowly towards the exit. Another customer is walking behind them with her son, who looks about 20. The son is obviously annoyed at the fact that he cannot get past the ladies walking so slowly. He speaks loud enough so that the whole shop can hear him.)

    Son: “God, these old people! Always getting in the way. They are useless. They should be locked up so they can’t get in normal people’s way.”

    (The son’s mum doesn’t say anything to him, but I can see that my dad is getting angry.)

    Son: “They don’t deserve pensions. Let them work until they drop! They probably retired when they were 45 and are leeching off the government.”

    (My dad taps the son on the shoulder.)

    Dad: “You’re making a scene and upsetting those ladies. Calm it down, would you?”

    Son: “They probably can’t even hear me. They’re all deaf anyway. Coffin dodgers! Why do you care if they even hear me?”

    Dad: “First, I’m 67 and have worked since I was 16 years old up until my retirement two weeks ago. Second, my parents taught me to respect my elders; something your mother obviously didn’t bother to do, considering I’m giving you the verbal battering she should be. And it’s not those women who should be locked up; it’s misinformed, loud idiots like you.”

    (By now the whole supermarket has stopped and is looking over at my dad.)

    Dad: “As for leeching off the government: I get a pension, the same as those ladies and thousands of other elderly people do and it’s just over the minimum wage. Sometimes I have to decide between heating my house and eating food! You wait until you get older and retire and see how it feels then to be treated like a second class citizen by obnoxious, mouthy trash!”

    (Throughout this whole thing the son has looked shocked. Finally his mother speaks up.)

    Mum: “You’re right, totally right. It shouldn’t take a stranger to tell my son his behaviour is terrible.” *to her son* “I am completely ashamed of you. You know nothing about hardship considering you are claiming unemployment money and living rent free in my house. Now apologise to those ladies and to this gentleman.”

    (The son says sorry, grudgingly, to all three.)

    Mum: “And you see all this food and those DVDs that you wanted and I paid for just now? Well, you won’t get one piece of it.”

    (The mum unloads all the food into the old ladies carts and gives the DVDs and a large piece of meat to my dad.)

    Mum: “I hope this goes some way to making you feel valued and appreciated.”

    (They walk out and the supermarket is silent for a moment. Then one of the old ladies starts to applaud and so does the rest of the customers and staff. The next time my dad went in to get his shopping they gave him £100 worth of coupons, and now all the staff know him.)

    Related:
    Retired & Extremely Dangerous

    Ah, Grandmothers, Part 3

    | Piscataway, NJ, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Family & Kids

    (My aunt works at a popular doughnut shop chain near my grandmother’s house. One evening, my older sister and her boyfriend, my little brother, and I decide to head there after an afternoon at a fair, while waiting for my mom to pick us up. A short while afterward, a couple of tough-guy type young men walk in, making rude comments, being loud, and generally making a nuisance of themselves. The leader of the group approaches the counter where my aunt is working.)

    Customer #1: “Yo, b****, gimme your number.”

    Aunt: “I don’t think so. Is there anything you’d like to order?”

    Customer #1: “How ’bout a piece of that a**?”

    Aunt: “Sorry, not on the menu. Now order something or please leave.You’re holding up the line.”

    Customer #2: “B****, we’ll leave when we wanna leave.”

    Customer #3: “Yeah, who’s gonna stop us, little old you?”

    Aunt: “No, little old [Manager]. Now, please, place your order or get out.”

    (The customer orders two cases of donuts, and throws his money to the ground.)

    Customer #1: “See what you did? Pick it up and hand it back to me!”

    Aunt: “Um, it’s on your side of the counter.”

    (The customer picks up his money and walks over behind the counter and throws it down again.)

    Customer #1: “Now pick it up, b****!”

    Aunt: “No. As a matter of fact, leave. I’m refusing service.”

    Customer #1: “Why, because I’m black?!”

    Aunt: “No, because you’re acting like an imperious a**hole, and you have been since you walked in. Now leave, or I’m calling the police.”

    (As luck would have it, a police officer stops inside the shop.)

    Me: “Wow, that was fast.”

    Customer #1: “Officer, this racist b**** was trying to kick me and my homies out. We ain’t even done nothin’!”

    Officer: “Really? Because what I saw was you throwing your money at this woman twice, in addition to walking behind the counter, which isn’t allowed for non-employees.”

    (The customer and his buddies start throwing a fit, yelling expletives, flipping everybody off, and generally acting unruly. Then they head outside and start throwing boxes around; the leader even takes off his shirt and tries goading everyone into a fight.)

    Customer #1: “COME ON, I’LL SHOW Y’ALL! I’LL BEAT Y’ALLS A**ES SO HARD! COME ON!”

    (He has another argument with the officer, but thankfully leaves with his buddies. However, he comes back a few minutes later accompanied not by his friends, but his grandmother.)

    Customer’s Grandmother: “So I understand y’all have a problem servin’ my grandbaby?”

    Customer: “Yeah, yeah, they were callin’ me all kinds of s***, and the girl over there was saying we were on food stamps!”

    Customer’s Grandmother: “…[Customer's Name], stand outside and wait while I talk to the officer here.”

    (The customer steps outside and my aunt explains everything that happened. After hearing it, the grandmother is incensed and walks outside.)

    Customer’s Grandmother: “YOU LITTLE PUNK-A**! GET YO’ A** IN THE CAR NOW! You dragged me outta my home for THIS?!”

    (As they drive off, my mom finally pulls in.)

    Mom: “So, what’d I miss?”

    Related:
    Ah, Grandmothers, Part 2
    Ah, Grandmothers
    Ah, Mothers
    Ah, Fathers
    Ah, Fathers, Part 2

    I Do Work Here, Does Not Work Here

    | Melbourne, VIC, Australia | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Liars & Scammers

    (It is Valentine’s Day, and I work at one of the more popular restaurants in the city. When I arrive to start my shift, there is a long line of couples coming out of the doors. I am clearly in my work uniform, and I approach the door to start my shift. The first customer in line throws his hand in front of me to block the door.)

    Customer #1: “Whoa, man, can you not see the line?”

    Me: “Excuse me? No, sorry, sir, I work here.”

    Customer #1: “Yeah, nice try. Back of the line.”

    Me: “Sir, I clearly work here, as you can see by my uniform and name tag. If you don’t mind, my shift starts in a few minutes and I’d rather not be late.”

    Customer #1′s Girlfriend: “Look, buddy, we’ve been waiting here for 30 minutes. No silly costume is gonna get you in ahead of me.”

    Customer #1: “Yeah, my girl deserves the best, so don’t think you’re gonna take it away from her on Valentine’s Day. So why don’t you just go and wait like the rest of us before I f*** you up!”

    Me: “Look, sir, I don’t understand why you don’t believe me, but I really do work here and I’m meant to be inside right now! Can you please just let me go to work?”

    (Customer #2, standing in line behind Customer #1, decides to chime in.)

    Customer #2: “Look, mate, he’s made it quite clear to you that he works here. Why don’t you just let him through?”

    (Note: Customer #1 is clearly a good few inches taller and more muscular than Customer #2.)

    Customer #1: “Excuse me? Did you really want to get involved?”

    Customer #2: “Uh, no! Sorry!” *to me* “Sorry, mate, I tried.”

    (At this point, I am already a good few minutes late, and my phone starts to ring.)

    Me: “Hello?”

    Manager: “[Name], where the h*** are you? One of the busiest nights of the year and you choose to be late now?”

    Me: “I’m right outside. I have been for ten minutes, but this customer won’t let me through because he doesn’t believe I work here!”

    Manager: “What?! Hang on.”

    (My manager hangs up and comes outside to find me barricaded by the customers. He looks at me, but points at Customer #1 and his girlfriend.)

    Manager: “Is this them?”

    Me: “Yep.”

    Manager: “Look, do you want to explain to me why you’ve made my best worker late?”

    Customer #1: “What? He doesn’t actually work here, does he?”

    Manager: “I don’t want to deal with this tonight. Take your girlfriend and leave. There’s no chance of you getting a table after all this. [Name], come inside and I’ll check the tapes later so I don’t have to mark you late.”

    (Customer #1 and his girlfriend are banned from the restaurant. Even better, Customer #2 ended up giving me a huge tip!)

    Related:
    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 12
    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 11
    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 10
    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 9
    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 8
    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 7
    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 6
    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 5

    A Blockhead’s Calling

    | OR, USA | Bad Behavior, Bigotry, Technology

    (I am working in a call center providing customer care support for a major wireless provider.)

    Me: “Thank you for being the best part of [Company]. My name is [Name]. With whom do I have the pleasure of speaking with this evening?”

    Caller: “[Caller's Name].”

    Me: “Alright, and I see that you’ve already verified through our automated system. Thank you very much for that. And what can I help you with tonight?”

    Caller: “I want to know how to block calls.”

    Me: “Alright, I can certainly help you out with that. I see here that you’re using an iPhone 4s; iOS 7 has the—

    Caller: “No, I just want to block calls. I keep getting texts from someone who apparently knew whoever had this number before me, and they won’t stop. I just want to block the messages.”

    Me: “I understand that, sir, and I was just trying to go over all your options for doing so. As I was saying, iOS 7 has the built-in ability to block calls. Alternatively, our block-call feature has the ability to block calls. That normally costs $4.99 a month, but there is a 90 day free trial for that.”

    Caller: “You mean you charge me nine-f********-ninety-nine to f****** block calls?!?”

    Me: “Well, sir, that was $4.99, but yes, that is a feature we do charge for.”

    Caller: “Is there a supervisor I can speak to?”

    Me: “I can certainly get you our next level of support, but I’ll need to place you on a brief hold while I get them on the line.”

    Caller: “You do that.”

    (Before I can place him on hold, he decides to make a comment to someone in the background, without moving the phone away.)

    Caller: “Stupid f****** hick must be real happy with his f****** call center job.”

    (I decide to respond in the most polite tone I can muster.)

    Me: “Well, sir, I wouldn’t say I enjoy it, but it does pay the bills. Let me put you on that hold, now, so I can get you our next level support.”

    (The caller hung up before I could get a manager on the line, and he didn’t answer when the manager tried to call him back. I can’t imagine why…)

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