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  • Had It Up To Their Neck With Bad Customers
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    Category: Bad Behavior

    Putting The Security Into Social Security

    | USA | Bad Behavior, Money, Top

    (I work as a collections agent for a major bank in the USA.)

    Me: “Thank you for calling [major bank]; my name is Kevin. What can I—”

    Customer: “English, ass-h***! Speak English!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m speaking English.”

    Customer: “I just want to pay my [other bank's] credit card. My SSN is [number].”

    Me: “Ma’am you are calli—”

    Customer: “How you dare to interrupt me! My check account is [number] and my name is [name].”

    Me: “Miss, you are calling [major bank], not [other bank].”

    Customer: “What?! Who are you? Why are you calling me? I’m going to the police! I want your f****** name, and I want to speak with your supervisor before I go there and shoot someone!”

    Me: “Okay…”

    (I mute the headset.)

    Customer: “What are you waiting for?!”

    Me: “I’m waiting for you to tell me why you need to speak to my supervisor. If it was because you called a wrong number and said all you personal info, or maybe because you cursed at me several times, or that you, in a recorded, federal monitored line, threatened to shoot me.”

    Customer: “Oh, no! I didn’t say that!”

    (I check on the database for her full name with her SSN.)

    Me: “Okay, let me put you on hold so I can speak with my supervisor and call the police. Your full name is [full name], right? Your address is [address], and your phone is [phone number].”

    (The customer hangs up. I end up having a verbal warning from my boss, along with a free meal from him for “the funniest following-guidelines-call I have ever heard”.)

    The Four Pillars Of Bad Behavior

    | Ottawa, ON, Canada | Awesome Workers, Bad Behavior, Bigotry, Food & Drink, Top

    (I work in a poutine place downtown; we stay open until 4 am on weekends due to the nightlife. We never usually have an issue with drunk people.)

    Coworker: “I’m sorry; we do not accept credit. Do you have another method of payment?”

    Customer: “I will have you know I am the f****** niece of the owner, and he will have you all fired!”

    Coworker: “Unfortunately, that does not address the issue at hand.”

    Customer: “You f****** f**!”

    (She continues to throw insults at my coworker, telling him to go back to Africa, despite him being Caucasian. He maintains his composure.)

    Customer: “F*** you, just let me pay for my f****** food!”

    (I am right around the corner, and am an African-American female. I decide to intervene.)

    Me: “[Coworker] seems to have a lot more patience for your crap than I do. Our machines do not recognize credit cards, and that fact is completely irrelevant to his orientation. Moreover, the owner’s only brother isn’t even 30, and therefore cannot biologically have a daughter in her 20s. And that stuff about going back to Africa? You can take that up with me. Have a nice night!”

    (The customer falls silent. The crowd parts as she exits the store.)

    Coworker: “Wow, remind me not to p*** you off!”

    Me: “Don’t worry; you won’t be seeing that again. It’s one thing to be so disrespectful, another to be a compulsive liar, another to be homophobic, and another to be racist. She needed a talking to!”

    (All the customers who witness the incident tip us really well for dealing with her!)

    Direction Deflection

    | Vancouver, BC, Canada | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Top

    (I work at a small kiosk in a mall. Due to the booth-like appearance and the lack of any walls, many shoppers like to ask me for directions to other businesses in the mall.)

    Shopper: “Hey, where’s the post office?”

    Me: “Right behind you; there is a camera store—”

    Shopper: “No! I want the post office, not photos!”

    Me: “Like I said, there’s a camera store behind y—”

    Shopper: “Shut up about the d*** cameras! I need the nearest post office!”

    Me: “And if you would just take an extra few seconds to listen to me, I would’ve been able to inform you that there is a postal service desk inside of the camera store.”

    Shopper: “Hey, it’s not my fault you weren’t being clear! Also, that’s no way to talk to a paying customer!”

    Me: “With all due respect, ma’am; you haven’t bought anything from me. You’re not a paying customer. Secondly, I am running a business here, not an information booth. I personally think you are a greater target for criticism; you’re lucky I went lightly. Now, unless you plan on buying something; please let me do my real job.”

    Customer: “A**-hole!”

    Age Comes Before Rage

    | Indianapolis, IN, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Top

    (My girlfriend and I are waiting in line. Our baby is getting more and more agitated. It’s almost our turn when a middle-aged customer comes running up behind me, and starts glaring at me.)

    Middle-Aged Customer: “Move your stuff! I have less than you; I should go first!”

    Me: “Uh… no.”

    (The cashier reaches for the first of our items.)

    Middle-Aged Customer: “No! Don’t take his stuff! I should go first! I’m older than he is, and I have less stuff!”

    (The cashier is just as flabbergasted as we are. My son starts screaming bloody murder.)

    Middle-Aged Customer: “You should shut your son up! Let me go first!”

    (My girlfriend hands our son to me and steps up to the woman.)

    Girlfriend: “Shut the f*** up!”

    (She turns to the cashier.)

    Girlfriend: “Honey, can you please start ringing up our items?”

    (She turns back to the woman.)

    Girlfriend: “You need to grow up and learn some d*** manners. You’ve got a cart and a half full, and our stuff was already on the belt when you decided to charge up and demand that we move; that’s not how it works in the real f****** world! And how dare you tell me to shut my baby up! He’s teething, and tired, and we would have already been out of here if you hadn’t decided to hold us up. Now tell me what the f*** makes you so much more important than us?!”

    Middle-Aged Customer: “I… I… I’m older than you two brats.”

    Girlfriend: “So, you’ve had more time to learn manners.”

    Middle-Aged Customer: “I have less stuff.”

    (My girlfriend glances back and forth to our stuff, which is almost done being bagged, and only takes up about half our cart, and her two carts.)

    Girlfriend: “Yeah, to a blind man.”

    Middle-Aged Customer: “I’ve got food in the car.”

    Girlfriend: “Then I guess you should have eaten before deciding to come shopping.”

    (The middle-aged customer slinks off to another lane. My girlfriend pays for our groceries, and gives the cashier a huge smile.)

    Girlfriend: “I had to deal with that all the time when I worked cash; sorry you had to see that.”

    (She grabs our son, and walks towards the door. The cashier and I exchange looks.)

    Me: “You should see her when she’s angry.”

    The Waiting Blame Game

    | NY, USA | Bad Behavior, Health & Body

    (It is a particularly busy day; the doctor is backed up nearly an hour. I am informing a patient who is checking in.)

    Patient: “AN HOUR?!? Are you kidding me? He expects me to wait an hour?”

    Me: “Yes, sir. I do apologize for the wait, but—”

    Patient: “I just need my test results. Give me a copy!”

    Me: “I can do that. Give me just a moment to make a copy.”

    (I take the report to the copier. A 94-year-old woman is checking out with my coworker.)

    Me: “Here you go, sir, your results.”

    (The patient reads through the results.)

    Patient: “Well, what does this word mean?”

    (He reads off a long medical term. Despite the fact that I know the meaning of the word, I am not allowed to explain his results to him due to HIPAA regulations.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir. I’m unable to explain the results to you. This is why you have your appointment to speak with the doctor.”

    Patient: “But you’re a nurse! You have to explain this to me! I didn’t eat any god-d*** lunch before this appointment, and if I don’t get a sandwich soon I’ll—”

    (The 94-year-old patient pipes up.)

    94-Year-Old Patient: “Excuse me, sir, but you are the rudest man I’ve ever known! Talking to a young girl like that! You ought to be ashamed of yourself. If you want your test results, you’d better wait. If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my 94 years on this earth, it’s that you should make the most of the time you have. If you have to spend that time in a doctor’s office waiting, well then, S*** HAPPENS!”

    (The man slinks away from the desk, sits in a chair, and mopes. He does, in fact, have to wait for an hour. He doesn’t say a word to any of us for the rest of his visit!)


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