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    Category: Bad Behavior

    No ID, No Idea, Part 16

    | Columbus, OH, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

    (I’m working register as my shift starts when a teenaged couple walks in. The guy walks up, girl in tow.)

    Customer: “I’d like some cigarettes, please.”

    Me: “I’ll need to see your ID.”

    Customer: “SERIOUSLY?”

    Me: “Uh, yeah. State law, all that.”

    Customer: “Do I look like I’m under 18?”

    Me: “Well, you look under 30, and that’s really what we go by.”

    Customer: “Ugh, FINE. I’ll go out to the car and grab it. What a waste of time.”

    (He leaves to go grab his ID out of the car. His girlfriend looks rather embarrassed. He storms back in, and slams his ID on the counter.)

    Customer: “There. Can I buy my f****** smokes now?”

    (I check his ID. It’s legit.)

    Me: “Sir, you turned 18 three days ago.”

    Customer: “Well, duh, I know that.”

    Me: “My point is, you’re going to be asked for ID for a long time, so, you might wanna be ready for that.”

    Customer: “But I’m 18! Why would people ask me for my ID now?”

    Me: “Because it’s the law… Can I give you another tip, sir?”

    Customer: *sighs* “What?”

    Me: “If you don’t want to be carded for age-restricted purchases, you probably shouldn’t be wearing your high-school letterman jacket around. Doesn’t help your case.”

    (He looks down at himself and verifies that he is, indeed, gaudily labeled as a high school student. His girlfriend giggles. He takes a moment to gather his thoughts.)

    Customer: “Oh… well, okay. Thanks for the advice. Can I get some smokes, now?”

    Me: “Certainly.”

    Related:
    No ID, No Idea, Part 15
    No ID, No Idea, Part 14
    No ID, No Idea, Part 13

    Streets Ahead Of The Customer

    | LA, USA | Awesome Workers, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

    (I am delivery driving pizza. My store has a 30-minute-or-less guarantee. I get a delivery order for E. 72nd St and head right over there with their order of a drink and a pizza. When I get to the address, I can’t find their house number. I call back to the store and verify the address. It comes back the same. I look some more… no luck. I call back again and they call back the person who placed the order who also verifies the same address. Still can’t find it! On a hunch I drive over to E. 72nd Road and find the guy. Note: this is NOT a nice neighborhood.)

    Customer: “You’re late! I want my order for free!”

    Me: “I can’t because you gave us the wrong address.”

    Customer: “Nope. I get it for free!”

    (He tries and tries to get me to give him the order for free, wasting my time.)

    Me: “Are you going to pay for this or not?”

    (He still insists on trying to talk me into giving it to him, so I flip open the pizza box, grab a slice, and start eating it right in front of him! I turn, get in my car, and head to the store. When I get there I tell my manager what I did, expecting to get chewed out.)

    Manager: *with a wink* “You’re going to have to pay for that order… Give me a dollar and don’t do that again.”

    (I thoroughly enjoyed that pizza and drink!)

    Not Showing Growth As A Person

    | PA, USA | Bad Behavior, Bizarre, Health & Body

    (I am a male with long hair. Sometimes when I feel like being a smart-a**, most of the time really, I end up having this conversation with other long haired men, in this case being a worker at a retail place. People tend to respond the same way, so it usually plays out the same way.)

    Me: “That long hair makes you look like a girl.”

    (The clerks features rapidly shift to annoyance, then confusion when they see my long hair, then anger.)

    Clerk: “Well, YOUR long hair makes you look like a girl, too!”

    Me: “No. No, it doesn’t. You see *points* I have a beard. So, my long hair makes me look look a dumba**. YOUR long hair makes you look like a girl.”

    Clerk: *stunned*

    Me: “Why don’t you have a beard?”

    Juggling Orders In Disorder

    | VA, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests

    (I’m on the phone taking an order for a catered event. A customer approaches the counter. Despite my other coworkers who are mostly unoccupied, the customer seems intent on getting my attention, and the customer on the phone won’t let me get a word in to ask her to hold for a second.)

    Counter Customer: “Excuse me! I need you!”

    Me: *trying to get the attention of another worker* “Someone will help you in a second.” *to the phone* “I’m sorry, could you repeat that last part, ma’am…”

    Counter Customer: “No! I need you to help!”

    Me: *points to phone* “I’m helping another customer right now. Someone will be right over.”

    Counter Customer: “NO! YOU HELP!”

    (At this point, I turn away to take the order on the phone. Suddenly, the customer comes behind the counter, snatches the phone from me and hangs it up.)

    Counter Customer: “You help me NOW!”

    Me: *exasperated* “Please go back around the counter, ma’am. What was it you needed?”

    Counter Customer: “I didn’t get a cup for my drink. ”

    (After sending her on her way, I call the other customer back.)

    Me: “I am so sorry about that we got disconnected, ma’am. How many people are you serving again?”

    Phone Customer: “I think I’m going to take my business elsewhere. It was very rude and unprofessional of you to hang up on a customer. If you didn’t want to take my order, you could have just said!” *click*

    Look Out For The Always Looking, Part 2

    | UT, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests

    (We close early at 5 on Sundays, which usually throws some customers who assume we are open until our regular time. Most customers get the hint when the lights automatically dim at closing and the music is turned off. Sometimes, however, customers still don’t get the hint. A couple and their young daughter walk in at 4:55 and begin shopping around. By 5:20, they are the only ones left in the store and seem to have no idea that we’re closed. I decide to go up to them to see if they need any help.)

    Me: “Hi, can I help you guys find anything today?”

    Customer: “Nope, we’re finding everything all right, thanks.”

    Me: “Okay, great! Just so you know, we are closing soon, so just let me know if I can help you find anything.”

    Customer: *brushing me away* “Uh-huh, thanks.”

    (About 15 more minutes pass. The store is recovered immaculately and the closing team is literally just waiting for these customers to check out so we can close the last register and go home. I decide to try one more time.)

    Me: “Are you three still doing all right?”

    Customer: “Yeah, we’re doing fine. Just looking around still!”

    Me: “Okay…”

    (At this point, the family begins to head to the dressing room to try clothes on. I’m beginning to get pretty annoyed and impatient, so I turn to my coworker.)

    Me: “[Coworker], what time is it?”

    Coworker: “It’s 5:40.”

    Me: *sighing* “Guess we’re not going home any time soon.”

    Customer: *turns around cheerfully surprised* “Oh! By the way, what time do you guys close?”

    Coworker: “We actually closed at five.”

    Customer: “Oh, silly me! We’ll get going now.”

    (The family ended up using a rewards points coupon which covered pretty much their whole purchase, meaning the store made no money off of them and there was no benefit to having them in the store so late.)

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