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    Category: Bad Behavior

    Sodium And So Dum

    | FL, USA | Bad Behavior, Extra Stupid, Health & Body

    Customer: “I’d like a half-pound of the [Cheap Brand] low-sodium ham, please!”

    Me: “I’m sorry. We don’t have [Cheap Brand] low-sodium ham. We do have the [Premium Brand] low-sodium ham, though.”

    Customer: “No, you do have the [Cheap Brand] kind. It’s right there.”

    (She points to the Cheap Brand boiled ham, which is the lowest quality meat we sell, and is loaded with salt and fat.)

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m afraid that ham isn’t low-sodium. Actually, that’s the highest-sodium ham we have.”

    Customer: “WHAT?! I’ve been eating that ham for three months because I thought it was healthy! My doctor said my blood pressure was dangerously high!”

    Me: “Um… that’s not good. Did one of the employees here tell you that ham was low-sodium?”

    Customer: “No! I just assumed it was!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but you probably should have asked someone here about that.”

    Customer: “SHUT UP! IF I HAVE A HEART ATTACK IT’S YOUR FAULT!”

    Obsessions With Possessions

    | Houston, TX, USA | Bad Behavior, Extra Stupid

    (We don’t have associates permanently supervising the fitting rooms, so they’re left unattended for periods of time while the fitting room associate cleans out the other ones. I enter an open fitting room to find an entire outfit of clothes that we do not sell. My first instinct was that someone had changed into our clothes in the fitting room and stolen them, leaving theirs behind. I then look over to see a phone and a purse left in the fitting room, and take the items to a manager to report the incident and laugh at the supposed thief’s stupidity. Just then, an angry looking woman comes up to the counter.)

    Customer: “Those are my things!”

    Me: “Oh! You left them in the fitting room.”

    Customer: *angrily* “Well, I wasn’t finished…”

    Me: “I’m sorry ma’am. You left your things in an open, unsupervised fitting room. You’re lucky I found them. If another customer had walked in there they could have just grabbed them at walked right out.”

    Customer: “But I wasn’t finished!”

    Not Been Teenage For An Age

    | ON, Canada | Bad Behavior, Health & Body

    (I’m older than I look, and married. I also have my nose pierced and a couple of tattoos that show if I’m wearing a t-shirt.)

    Older Male Customer: “Do you have a boyfriend, young lady?”

    Me: “No, I’m—”

    Customer: “No wonder with all that nonsense on your arms and that hoop in your face. How do you ever expect to get a boyfriend looking like that?”

    Me: “Well, my husband doesn’t seem to mind them.”

    Customer: “Married?! You’re only a teenager.”

    Me: “Sir, I’m 25…”

    Customer: *blushes and turns away, fuming*

    Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 6

    | UK | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Health & Body

    (I’m 26 but quite petite, so I often get mistaken for being a lot younger. I’m also married and seven months pregnant. I’m at a higher end department store trying on dresses. I’m just leaving the changing room with a very helpful salesgirl. The next person goes in leaving a customer and her teen daughter next in line.)

    Customer: *in a stage whisper* “See! That’s why you keep your legs closed at school. So you don’t end up buying your prom dress looking like that.”

    (Her daughter goes red as several other customers stare in disbelief.)

    Daughter: “For God’s sake, mum! Shut up!”

    Me: “Oh, no, your mum’s right. That’s exactly what my mum told me. When I was 16. 10 years ago.”

    (The customer reddens as her daughter glares at her.)

    Me: “So what I did was, I studied hard at school, went to university, and got a degree. I started my own business, bought a car, and then a house. I met my partner, dated for a couple of years, then got married. Now that we’re financially comfortable we’re having a baby. I’m not saying that’s for everyone but you don’t want to wake up one day to find you’re 50, miserable, bigoted, and rude.”

    Customer: *very embarrassed by everyone’s stares* “I’m only 42!”

    Me: “I’m sure that’s what your daughter will remember about today.”

    Related:
    Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 5
    Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 4
    Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 3
    Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 2
    Cause For Pregnant Pause

    A Listening Ear Can Switch Gear

    | Omaha, NE, USA | Bad Behavior, Wild & Unruly

    (I am a security guard for a company unaffiliated with the business I provide security for. I literally sit in a shack and sign reps from other companies in and out of the complex. I am way over-qualified for this position, but it is perfect for going to school.)

    Me: “Morning, sir. What brings you to [Company]?”

    Customer: “MY DAD DIED TWO YEARS AGO AND THEY WON’T TRANSFER THE OWNERSHIP OF THE BILLS TO ME!”

    Me: “Okay, sir. Here is where you have to go.” *gives site name directions and what to do and say*

    Customer: “Ugh! YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THAT I DROVE TWO HOURS TO THIS LOCATION JUST TO BE TOLD THAT I’M WRONG!?”

    Me: “Yup.”

    Customer: “WELL, WHAT HAPPENED TO CUSTOMER SERVICE IN THE WORLD!? I WANT YOU TO TRANSFER MY BILLS TO ME!”

    Me: “Not my problem, sir. I don’t work for [Company]. I just provide security from customers like you.”

    Customer: “GAH! *slams his sports car into reverse and leaves pretty thick black lines in the concrete* “D*** IT!”

    (Hours later, the guy came back with coffee and some sandwiches, parked in front of the shack, apologized profusely, and told me about recent events: cheating wife, ungrateful daughter, and a recent suicide by his mother. I listened and give him my number and told him to call whenever he needed a friendly ear. He calls once a month.)

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