November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

Category: Bad Behavior

Flea To The Devil

| SC, USA | Bad Behavior, Pets & Animals

(I am an assistant manager of an extremely popular supermarket. A middle-aged woman stops me as I pass the pet department.)

Customer: “Hey! You! I need some help.”

Me: “Sure thing, ma’am. I’m off the clock right now but I’ll see what I can do.”

Customer: “Tell me if this will work on puppies.” *thrusts box of flea medicine at my chest*

Me: “Well, it depends on the weight and age of the puppies. What breed are they?”

Customer: “Oh, my god! I don’t know! Some mutt my daughter found! I made her put it in the shed and it had puppies!”

Me: “Okay, not a problem. How old are they?”

Customer: “Three days.”

Me: “Wait, come again?”

Customer: “Are you deaf?! I said three days!”

Me: “Ma’am, you can’t put flea medicine, especially medicine for a dog ten pounds or heavier, on a puppy that’s three days old.”

Customer: “And why the h*** not!? I don’t want them getting fleas. Then they’d be all over my shed!”

Me: “Wait, they don’t even have fleas?”

Customer: “NO! You’re such an idiot!” *grabs the box back from him* “They’re at my house and I’ll put whatever I want on them!”

Me: *somewhat frantically* “Ma’am, they’ll die.”

Customer: “GOOD! I want those f****** ugly dogs dead! Those mutt, mix-breed dogs are a sin and will go to hell! I have a purebred Yorkshire Terrier and can’t risk having fleas in MY shed! I’m calling corporate about you trying to tell me what to do!”

(She then grabbed a second box and stormed out of the aisle, shouting about “mix-breeds are the devil’s work.”)

Abandon All Hope All Ye Who Abandon Your Children

| MD, USA | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids

(One customer repeatedly leaves her six-year-old in the store for hours at a time. The kid would try to tear the controllers off our demo machines, throw game boxes, and sometimes rip down entire displays. After a particularly busy morning in the holiday season, the customer walks her son in, and then makes to leave.)

Me: “Ma’am, you’ve forgotten your child.”

Woman: “I’ll be right back. He’ll be fine.”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry but you can’t leave your child here unattended.”

Woman: “I’m just going to be fifteen minutes. Watch him for me.”

Me: “Ma’am, we are not a daycare and I cannot assume responsibility for your kid. I see kids dragged out of the store screaming and crying because their parents won’t buy them something, and I have no way of knowing if a kid is being a brat or being abducted by a random stranger.”

Woman: “You’re telling me that you’d let my kid get taken?”

(I sigh, because that usually is enough to scare the parent into watching their kid better. My manager, who had been dealing with customers but had been paying attention, called out from behind the counter.)

Manager: “Ma’am, if you leave your child here I’m going to call the social services and report that the child’s been abandoned.”

(The customer’s eyes widen. She grabs her child by the arm and drags him out.)

Me: “Can we even do that?”

Manager: “No idea, but she doesn’t know that.”

An Unrewarding Exchange

| Fort Pierce, FL, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

(At my job, cashiers are required to go through a spiel for every transaction such as offering extended warranties or store credit cards. The big thing we push is the free store Rewards program. Mostly it’s a points/rewards program, but occasionally it also gets the customer a discount as well on certain items.)

Me: “Okay, ma’am, would you like to sign up for our [Rewards Program]?

Customer: “No, you people always want me to sign up for some s***!”

Me: “Not a problem, ma’am.”

(We continue with the transaction. As I hit total, the register prompts me that the customer would save five dollars on her sweaters if she signs up for the program, which I am required to inform her.)

Me: “And ma’am, I know you said you didn’t want the rewards program, but if you sign up today at no charge, you would save $5 on your sweaters! Would you be inter—”

Customer: “NO! God-d***! I already said I don’t want your f****** card! God! Don’t you know how to listen?!”

Me: “That’s perfectly fine, ma’am. I am—”

Customer: “Just let me pay and get the h*** out!”

Me: “Okay, your total is [total]. Sorry I couldn’t help you save some money today.”


Me: “All right. Apologies, ma’am.”

(I finish the transaction and the customer leaves. The woman in line behind her has been very quiet but glaring at the previous woman.)

Me: “Hello, ma’am, how are you? Would you like to sign up for [Rewards Program]?”

Next Customer: “I’ll do it, but just so I can get the discount on these sweaters. And before you ask, no, thank you, I would not like the credit card, but unlike that woman, my mother taught me manners.”

A Special Case Of Special Treatment

| Atlanta, GA, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests

(I’m a customer at a restaurant that has a counter to make your order and pushes it down the counter towards the register where you pay. There are entrances on two sides of the building and only one register, so there tends to be two lines from both doors.)

Me: *to the customer at the front of the other line* “If you have decided, you can go ahead of me. I’m still deciding.”

Customer #1: *from the other line* “Thank you.”

(As he proceeds to the front counter, the customer who was behind me, Customer #2, speaks up.)

Customer #2: “Why did you let him through?”

Me: “I’m still deciding on what I’d like to order, so I let him pass so I wouldn’t hold up the line.”

Customer #2: “So you just let him pass? We have places to be and want to order as well! He should wait until after you and not break the pattern. You should learn some respect for everyone and not give anyone special treatment unless you give it to everyone!”

Me: *sigh* “If you’re in that much of a rush, you can go ahead of me as well.”

Customer #2: “D*** right I will!”

(Customer #2 pushes me aside as she moves in front of me to get to the counter. During the entire time she was ordering, she kept yelling at the employee about being too incompetent to work. After she and the next customer from the other line order, I step up to order. Whilst waiting for my order to be made, I wait in line to pay at the register. Upon reaching the register, Customer #2 is still near the register, looking through her order to make sure it’s right.)

Cashier: *to me* “Your order comes to [total].”

Me: “I’m sorry, but that’s much too low for my order.”

Customer #2: *upon hearing the price* “Yeah, he ordered much more food than me. Why is his food cheaper?”

Cashier: “Well, the customer that he let ahead gave extra money and paid for this man’s order.”

Customer #2: “And that makes it right? Nobody deserves special treatment unless everyone gets it!” *turns to me* “I demand that you give me money to pay for my meal!”

Me: “I will not. As you told me earlier, I should learn to respect everyone, but I’ve already learned to respect those who deserve respect. From the rudeness that you have shown, not only me, but the employees working here as well, you do not deserve my respect.”

Customer #2: *turning back to the cashier* “This man is rude to your customers! I demand that you refuse his order and kick him out!”

Cashier: “I’m not allowed to refuse service to any paying customer. If you’d like, I can get my manager and you can talk to him.”

Customer #2: “D*** right you will!”

(Completely astonished, I now have to wait at the register for the cashier to return so I can pay for the rest of the order, which results in the line being held up. Eventually, the manager comes out.)

Manager: “Is there something I can do to help?”

Customer #2: “Yes, you can get this piece of trash out of here.” *she points to me*

Manager: *looking at me, then back at her* “I will not.”

Customer #2: “Excuse me? I’m a paying customer, unlike this a**-hole who’s practically getting his meal free! I demand you get him out of here!”

Manager: “As I said, I will not. This gentleman is here at least once a week and is kind to each of us here. You, on the other hand, have shown that you’re willing to make a big fuss over something insignificant and holding up all the other customers. If anyone should be kicked out, it’s you.”

(All the customers and employees cheer in agreement.)

Customer #2: “How dare you speak to me that way! I’ll be calling corporate and getting this place shut down!”

Manager: “We’ll be waiting with the security footage to back us up.”

The Birth Of Assumption

| East Falmouth, MA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Bizarre

(A guy comes in, buys his stuff by credit card, as I hand him his bags and receipt:)

Me: “Have a nice day!”

Customer: “What? The h*** did you know?”

Me: “Sir?”

Customer: “The f*** did you know it was my birthday? You see my ID in my wallet or something?”

Me: “Uh… sir? All I said was have a nice day.”

Customer: “…”

Me: “…”

Customer: “Not ‘Happy Birthday?'”

Me: *trying VERY hard not to smirk* “…No.”

Customer: “Well, this day’s off to a good start…”

Me: *smiling sympathetically* “Have a nice day, sir. And Happy Birthday.”