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    Category: Bad Behavior

    That’s What You Get When You’re A Law Unto Yourself

    | FL, USA | Bad Behavior, Criminal/Illegal

    (As part of a college class we had to go to observe some criminal court proceedings. We attend a hearing where a private defense attorney is being incredibly rude to the prosecutor, who is a quiet, unassuming-looking middle-aged woman. At one point, he even calls her stupid. The prosecutor just ignores him. At end we get to ask some of the attorneys some questions, the rude defense attorney included.)

    Defense Attorney: “Hey. What’d you think?”

    Student #1: “You were a little rude.”

    Defense Attorney: “That’s just how you’ve got to be. Anyway, I’ve got nothing to worry about! I’m up against a kindergarten teacher!”

    Student #2: “Are you new here?”

    Defense Attorney: “Yeah, I just transferred from a firm in [other state].”

    Student #1: “Oh.” *we all look at each other*

    Student #2: “Have you heard of [high-profile murder case that resulted in a conviction]?”

    Defense Attorney: “Yeah.”

    Student #2: “Well, the prosecutor you were being rude to was the lead prosecutor in that case. We came here specifically to observe her.”

    Defense Attorney: *blushes* “Oh…”

    Needs To Clean Up Her Act

    | AK, USA | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Liars & Scammers, Top

    (A girl of about 12 starts to examine a table of pajamas that I had just folded a few minutes ago. At first I’m afraid that she’ll make a mess of everything but she does her best at folding the stuff that she unfolded. Soon her friend comes and looks at the pajamas. However, unlike the other girl, she doesn’t fold the stuff again and just throws the stuff she looks at back on the table.)

    Girl #1: “I, um, think the employees would like it if you folded the stuff instead of, um, setting it back unfolded.”

    Girl #2: “It’s their job. They get paid to do it so it’s not my problem.”

    Girl #1: *nervously* “Oh, er, but—”

    Girl #2: “Drop it! It’s their job. They should be thankful I’m leaving these unfolded! It gives them a job so they can earn money!”

    ([Girl #2] proceeds to take a stack of pajamas and throw them onto the table, causing many to fall. I’m about to interject when [Girl #1] speaks.)

    Girl #1: “So? Let’s say you have to clean the living room everyday, and your parents pay you for it.”

    Girl #2: “But—”

    Girl #1: “Shut up and listen! Let’s say you got it SPOTLESS and perfectly clean. And then your brother and his friend play video games for hours in there, spilling their snacks and leaving empty soda cans and wrappers everywhere. You don’t get paid extra to clean up that mess! And it would make you upset that you have to redo all that work! That’s what the employees probably feel like!”

    Girl #2: “Whatever, b****.”

    ([Girl #2] leaves. [Girl #1] one proceeds to start cleaning up the mess.)

    Me: “Don’t worry. I’ve got it. Thanks, though.”

    Girl #1: “Sorry about her. She’s a jerk.”

    Me: “It’s not a problem. I’ve had to pick up messes that are worse than this many times before.”

    (Later, I see [Girl #2] talking to her dad.)

    Girl #2: “And then she called me a b**** and walked off.”

    Dad: “Really? That’s odd for her behavior. I should have known better than to let you guys shop alone.”

    (Just then [Girl #1] walks up.)

    Girl #1: “My mom will be here to pick me up, so you don’t need to give me a ride home Mr. [Last Name].”

    Dad: “Is it true you called [Girl #2] a rude name?”

    Girl #1: “What? No!”

    Girl #2: *in fake tears* “Yeah. She, she yelled yelled at me, and called me rude names besides b****!”

    Dad: “Stop saying that. Now, [Girl #1], I’m telling your mom and we’ll discuss this later.”

    Girl #1: “But, I didn’t…”

    ([Girl #2] is smirking at [Girl #1] between her fake sobs. I step in.)

    Me: “Sir, I actually witnessed the event.”

    (As I explain the event to the dad, [Girl #1], who is on the verge of tears because of how upset she is, starts to feel better now that she has someone backing her up. [Girl #2] stops faking her tears and stops smirking.)

    Dad: “Thanks.” *turns to [Girl #1]* “I’m terribly sorry.” *turns to [Girl #2]* “What’s gotten into you? You’re in deep trouble now!”

    (I had to go, but I was happy to know that the younger girl didn’t get in trouble!)

    Went On A Jurassic Lark

    | Rapid City, SD, USA | Bad Behavior, Criminal/Illegal, Family & Kids, Top

    (I work at a geology museum. A woman and her son, who looks about five, walk in. The boy is entranced by the mammoths, dinosaurs, and marine reptile skeletons on display. The mother looks unimpressed, and is on the phone for most of her stay. Since the building is kept at a pleasant temperature, she drops her heavy coat off with me at the front desk. Later, I spot her heading for the exit.)

    Me: “I hope you had a good time at our museum. Did you have any questions before you go?”

    Mother: “I’m not interested in your stupid dinosaurs.”

    (She heads for the elevator, which is around a corner. I assume she has her child waiting there, since I can’t see him in the rest of the museum. Three hours later, I see her son wandering around the displays, looking lost. I rush over to him.)

    Me: “Hey, buddy. What are you doing here?”

    Son: *in the most heartbroken voice ever* “Have you seen mommy? I fell asleep.”

    Me: “I saw her a little while ago, bud. Why don’t you have a seat over here? Do you have your mom’s phone number, or a way to contact her?”

    (Fortunately, he has a list of emergency-contact numbers in a tiny wallet. I call the one labeled ‘Mom’ in blue crayon, after giving him some paper and colored pencils.)

    Mother: “Who is this?!”

    Me: “This is [My Name], from [Museum's Name]. We have—”

    Mother: “You d*** well better ship me my coat, you b****! That’s a $500 coat, and I’m already on the other side of the state!”

    Me: “You also left your son here, ma’am. And I don’t have a box in his size.”

    Mother: *after a brief pause* “You son of a b****! You should have told me I left my kid behind! It’s going to take me five f****** hours to get back there!”

    (I decided to end the call, and instead called the police department. The mother stormed in a little over four hours later, long after the museum is supposed to be closed. She had a nice long conversation with child-care services. Her son gave me a hug and thanked me for staying with him. I still have his drawing of a plesiosaur.)

    About To Get Charged With Battery, Part 4

    | Stuart, FL, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Technology, Transportation

    (I work for a national electronics retail chain as a manager. I have one other employee working for me this night.)

    Me: “How can I help you?”

    Customer: “I need a new battery for my car’s remote.”

    Me: “Okay. Let’s take a look.”

    (The customer hands me the remote, I take it from her and quickly open it using a tool I keep on the counter. I find that the remote actually takes two button batteries, which is nothing unusual. I take them out and put them on the counter. I turn around and see I only have two left. I pull them off the rack, open one and put it in the remote. I go to open the second one and the customer stops me and snatches the still sealed battery out of my hand.)

    Customer: “What is this?”

    Me: “It’s one of the batteries you need for your remote.”

    Customer: “Are you sure?”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am.”

    (I show her the numbers on the old batteries and new ones match.)

    Customer: “There’s two of them?”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am.”

    Customer: “Where’s the other one?”

    Me: *I point to the battery in the remote* “I already installed it.”

    Customer: “I didn’t see you do that. Where did it come from?”

    Me: *I pick up the now empty battery package* “I just installed it.”

    Customer: “I want to see you install it.”

    Me: “You want me to take it out and put it back in?”

    Customer: “Yes!”

    (I take the new battery back out and put it back in.)

    Customer: “NO! I want to see you open it!”

    Me: “You want me to seal the package then open it again?”

    Customer: “Yes!”

    Me: “Ma’am, the packages come glued closed from the factory. I can’t re-seal it.”

    Customer: “Then get another one!”

    (At this point, I can tell the customer is going to be unreasonable but I do my best to keep my composure while my employee silently stands next to me observing.)

    Me: “Ma’am, I only have two left. One is already in your remote and the other one is in your hand.”

    Customer: “Listen to me you little p****! You don’t be condescending to me! Do what I tell you or I’m gonna complain to your f****** boss!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I am the manager and I am trying to help you. There’s no need for name calling.”

    Customer: “DON’T YOU F****** TALK TO ME LIKE THAT, YOU MORON! THERE’S NO WAY YOU’RE THE BOSS HERE! I WANT TO TALK TO YOUR SUPERIOR!”

    (At this point, the customer is unreasonably irate. I decide that $5 worth of batteries is not worth raising my blood pressure. I take out the new battery and re-install her old ones then close the remote.)

    Me: “Here you go, ma’am. Have a nice day.”

    Customer: “YOU PUT THE NEW ONES IN?”

    Me: “No, ma’am. I put your old ones back in.”

    Customer: “WHY THE F*** WOULD YOU DO THAT?!”

    Me: “You are being overly difficult over something very basic. I have chosen to exercise my right not to serve you. Please leave my store.”

    Customer: “YOU CAN’T DO THAT TO ME! I’M GONNA CALL YOUR CORPORATE OFFICE!”

    Me: “I’ll be expecting to hear your complaint.”

    (The customer storms towards the door.)

    Employee: “Have a nice night, ma’am.”

    Customer: “SHUT THE F*** UP!”

    (The employee looks at me and smiles, dumbfounded by this ridiculous encounter. I then call my district manager and tell him about the encounter. He assures me he will stand behind my decision not to serve her. Minutes later, I go to the grocery store to get something to snack on and find the same woman standing in an aisle yelling at three managers of the grocery store.)

    Related:
    About To Get Charged With Battery, Part 3
    About To Get Charged With Battery, Part 2
    About To Get Charged With Battery

    Just Got Bumped Despite The Bump

    | Wichita, KS, USA | Bad Behavior, Health & Body

    (I am 9-months pregnant and just opening the door to the restroom as a patron taps me on the shoulder.)

    Patron: “Excuse me. Is this the ladies room?”

    Me: “Sorry. This is a single use stall, but we have restroom facilities in the main lobby.”

    Patron: “Great. That’s not too far for you to walk.”

    (The patron steps around me into the bathroom and slams the door in my face.)


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