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    Category: Awesome Workers

    Date Updated

    | Reading, England, UK | Awesome Workers, Food & Drink, Health & Body

    (I get home from work to find my wife (who gets home before me) has unpacked the shopping which has been delivered.)

    Me: “What do you want for tea?”

    Wife: “We were going to have macaroni but we’ll have to have the chicken biryani instead because it goes out of date today. There were six things which go out today, which is outrageous.”

    Me: “I thought they were supposed to inform you when they gave you things with today’s use-by date?”

    Wife: “So did I. So I rang them up to complain. Such a nice lady, she apologised and gave us a refund on each of these articles.”

    Me: “Nice of her.” *goes to fridge* “What, this chicken Biryani? Doesn’t go out of date until Saturday.”

    (Today is Thursday.)

    Wife: “What! But it distinctly says: use by the 12th.”

    Me: “Yes, and today’s the 10th.”

    Wife: “Oops.”

    (She rang the supermarket back and was really apologetic about it. The woman at the other end was so happy to receive an apologetic phone call she let us keep the refund.)

    Dolled Up And Priced Down

    | Summit, NJ, USA | Awesome Customers, Awesome Workers

    (I work at a small mom and pop pharmacy. We are having a buy-one-get-one sale on some collectible dolls. A middle-aged female customer is browsing the collectibles. There are six different dolls, each a different color. I happen to be at the counter where they are displayed.)

    Me: “Hello, I see you are interested in these dolls.”

    Customer: “Yes, but I’m unsure which one to get.”

    Me: “Well, we are having a sale on them.”

    Customer: “I see.”

    Me: “Well, just inform me which ones you decide on.”

    Customer: *eyes light up* “I can get more than one!?”

    Me: “Yes.”

    Customer: “How much for one?”

    Me: “$14.50.”

    (The customer starts counting on her fingers, then sighs.)

    Me: “What seems to be the problem?”

    Customer: “I only have enough money for three of them.”

    (I am confused.)

    Customer: “Even with your sale, I would only get be able to get four.”

    (I figure out what is the misunderstanding in her logic.)

    Me: “How about this, you buy three and I’ll give you the other three on the house?”

    Customer: “You will won’t you get in trouble for that?”

    Me: “I won’t tell if you won’t tell.”

    (I got her dolls and rang her up. She kinda skipped out of the store.)

    Acting His Shoe Size

    | NY, USA | Awesome Workers, Rude & Risque

    (I’m 15 and I work at my father’s sports bar. All legal except I can’t carry alcohol. I receive inappropriate comments from time to time from the intoxicated men I’m surrounded by. I am bussing a group’s table when this happens.)

    Customer: “Hey I like your shoes! Do you like mine?”

    Me: “Uh, yeah, sure. They’re nice.”

    Customer: “They’re a size twelve. You know what they say about big feet?”

    (After realizing the situation was heading this direction I tried to come up with the wittiest answer I could muster.)

    Me: “Um, big egos?”

    Crazy Requests Only Go In One Direction

    | UK | At The Checkout, Awesome Workers, Crazy Requests

    (I work in a shop that sells comics, video games, trading cards, and assorted trinkets related to the culture around them. I work in the back where I test incoming consoles to check for issues. Between the back and the front is a small hole in the wall where I see a customer with a problem.)

    Coworker: “That’s gonna be £32.20.”

    Customer: “Wait, I have the deal here.”

    (The place is running a small deal where you get 10% of the cheapest item if you present a flyer with the deal written on the back. My coworker proceeds to change the price accordingly. I get called to the front while the customer speaks to the owner. After hearing him rant for about five more minutes:)

    Customer: “I can’t believe you advertize a deal and not follow up on it. The [Competing Store] down the road would give me all this for free for all the trouble. What can YOU do for me?”

    Me: “Give you directions to [Competing Store]?”

    A Development For The Lesser Developed

    | Manila, Philippines | Awesome Workers, Bigotry, Technology

    (I am a technical support person for an ISP in Australia. Customers often ask us where the calls are routed to. They really don’t mind as long as you help them but this one is just different. After walking an irate customer through the troubleshooting steps:)

    Customer: “Where is this call routed to?”

    Me: “Your call has been routed here in the Philippines.”

    Customer: *in a rude tone* “So, I’m basically talking to a monkey?”

    Me: “Yes, sir. A monkey who’s teaching you how to use your pocket wifi.”

    Customer: “…” *click*

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