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    Category: Awesome Customers

    The Life Of The Used And Abused

    | Philadelphia, PA, USA | Awesome Customers

    (A customer comes up to me with an item wrapped in bubble wrap.)

    Customer: “I’d like to return this, please.”

    (The customer hands me the item with no receipt and it’s obviously an item from Christmas. The candle in it has been lit and used and the item is missing part of the tag. I look up the item and find out it’s from Christmas of last year.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I cannot return this item.”

    Customer: “Well, why not?”

    Me: “This item is from Christmas of last year and our return policy is 30 days with your receipt. This is well over 30 days and is a holiday item. We do not accept refunds on holiday items.”

    Customer: “Well, that isn’t my fault. This thing is hideous and I don’t want it anymore.”

    Me: “I understand that, sir, but there isn’t anything I can do.”

    Customer: getting agitated* “Well you HAVE to take it back. I don’t want it. You guys sell ugly things.”

    (At this point, my manager comes over to deal with the increasingly agitated customer.)

    Manager: “Sir, is there a problem?”

    Customer: “Yes! This girl is telling me she won’t take back my item! It’s ugly! I don’t want it! [Competitor] has a policy that they will take back anything anytime! You have to do that too!”

    Manager: “Sir, I am sorry but this item is too old and it’s used. We can’t return it. That is our policy.”

    (This goes back a forth a few times. The customer keeps saying how our competitors policy would allow it. However, we are not affiliated with them, so obviously our policy is different. Finally, the customer gives up and grabs his item from me.)

    Customer: “[Competitor] would have taken it!”

    (The customer storms out and another customer comes up to my manager.)

    Customer #2: “Want me to kick his a** for you all the way to [competitor]?”

    Manager: *laughs* “Be my guest!”

    Should’ve Ripped You A New One

    , | Birmingham, AL, USA | Awesome Customers, Top, Wild & Unruly

    (I work at a really nice Country Club on the golf course side of things. Since it is a nice club, it isn’t unusual to get fairly large tips every once in a while.)

    Me: “Hey mister, could you break a hundred for me so we split tips tonight?”

    Member: *clearly inebriated* “Sure, man, I can totally break that hundred for you!”

    (I hand him the hundred dollar bill which he then proceeds to rip in half and then hand back to me.)

    Member: “There! I broke it for you.” *walks off laughing with his friends*

    Other Member: “Man, what an a**hole. Here’s another hundred for the ripped one. I appreciate y’all.”

    (I took the ripped hundred to the bank and they replaced it. I tried to give the other hundred back, but the member refused and said we earned it!)

    The Cappuccino’d Crusader

    | New York, USA | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink, Top

    (Note: I am with my friend at a coffee shop.)

    Me: *to friend* “Hey, can you order my drink for me? I have to go to the bathroom.”

    My Friend: “Yeah, of course!”

    (I return from the bathroom and sit in the waiting area with my friend.)

    Cashier: “I have a mocha frappe for Batman?”

    My Friend: *grins at me*

    Me: “What?”

    Cashier: “FRAPPE FOR BATMAN!”

    My Friend: *grins* “He’s calling you…”

    Me: “What do you…oh my God, you didn’t!”

    Cashier: “Yes, she did. Here’s your order, Batman.”

    Me: “Thank you.”

    Cashier: “No problem. Just remember to protect Gotham!”

    How To Make An Employee’s Day

    | New York, USA | Awesome Customers, Top

    (I work at a call center. As I’m working, I overhear my coworker talking another call.)

    Coworker: “Hi, my name is [name]. I’m calling from [organization]…”

    (As usual, I tune her out since it’s just a script and focus on my own call. However, after a few minutes, she hangs up and excitedly speaks to everyone in the room.)

    Coworker: “Guys! She used my name!”

    Manager: “What?”

    Coworker: “She used my name! When she hung up, she said, ‘Have a nice day, [name]‘!”

    (To this day, whenever the room’s getting a little down, someone always tells the story of the customer who used her name!)

    All You Need Is Love, Part 2

    | Michigan, USA | Awesome Customers

    (This is at the end of the conversation after explaining charges to a customer.)

    Customer: “Have I told you today that I love you?”

    Me: “Um, I’m sorry…what?”

    Customer: “Have I told you today that I love you?”

    Me: “Oh, you just did.”

    Customer: “I love you!”

    Me: “Thank you? And thank you for calling [utility company]. Have a great day!”

    Related:
    All You Need Is Love


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