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    Category: Awesome Customers

    Some Only Live For The Olive

    | Twin Cities, MN, USA | Awesome Customers, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

    (I’m a shopper at a high end grocery store. I stop at the olive bar to get olives for a party I’m having tonight. I’m blocked by a shopper who is grilling a store employee about something. She apparently isn’t happy about the selection and wants the store employee she’s talking to do something about it.)

    Store Employee: *to a shopper* “…I will let the manager know.”

    Shopper: “Well, what good will that do?! Can’t you just let the company know that customers want these kinds of olives?”

    Store Employee: “I don’t have a way of contacting the supplier, so my only option is to contact the manager and have him pass on your request.”

    Shopper: “This isn’t good enough! Why can’t I contact the supplier myself?”

    Store Employee: “Ma’am, I don’t have that information. I can only talk to my manager and let him know what you want and hopefully, he’ll be able to get the olives you want.”

    (The old woman chews her out and walks away. The employee just looks DEJECTED on a Friday afternoon, so I put my arm around her, and tell her…)

    Me: “When you get home, look up notalwaysright.com, and know that you are not alone. I’m not in the service sector, but I appreciate all you do for us, despite crabby old bats like that woman. Thanks for working and helping us out!”

    Smaller Box For Smaller Minded

    | IA, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Bad Behavior

    (I am working a Saturday before a holiday and am extremely busy. I have also been at work since 5 am. I am the only teenage guy allowed to run a cash register.)

    Customer #1: *to her cohort* “I f***ing hate this store, and hate these prices.”

    Cohort: “Mhmm.”

    (I finish ringing up everything.)

    Me: “That’ll be $245.15 today, ma’am.”

    Customer #1: “No, I am on [government program providing food to women with kids for the kids' nutritional needs].”

    Me: “Oh, I am sorry. Ma’am, you need to let me know that before, but don’t worry: I can rescan it and make sure it’s all right.”

    Customer #1: “D*** right.” *returns to talking to cohort*

    Me: *to person bagging groceries* “I need to redo this order.”

    Coworker: “Okay.”

    (My coworker unbags the groceries and helps me sort them out. At this point, I begin scanning items through. The computer lets me know if the items count for the program or not. A box of cereal doesn’t count and cannot be rung up for the government program.)

    Me: “Oh, I am sorry, ma’am, this cereal doesn’t count. I believe it has to be the smaller size.”

    Customer #1: “Are you f***ing kidding me? I just bought this same box of cereal with my last check.”

    Cohort: “Yeah, the female cashiers always ring it up right for us.”

    Me: “I am sorry, but the program just changed. You should have received a packet in the mail telling you what is now accepted. Would you like me to have someone get you the size that counts?”

    Customer #1: “Just because you have a penis means you think you can tell me what I can and can’t do! I just want cereal!”

    (Her rants continues for about five more minutes with a large number of customers all staring at us waiting to see what is going to happen.)

    Me: “I am sorry, ma’am. Would you like the smaller size?”

    Cohort: “Fine, go get the other box!”

    (I finish ringing up the lady and tell her to have a nice day, receiving a scowl and a middle finger in return. Customer #2, after standing in line behind during the whole ordeal, pushes her cart up to my stand. I recognize her but am to upset at this point to think twice about it.)

    Customer #2: “Well, that was unpleasant.”

    Me: “A little bit. How are you doing?”

    Customer #2: “Well, I am just fine. I want you to know something, though: you are my favorite cashier and I always come to your line. You have always been nothing but sweet to me and you ring me up quickly. As far as that lady goes, don’t worry; I will make sure she doesn’t bother you again.”

    (She proceeded to offer me a hug which I took. Later my boss came up to me and told me he received two reports about me. The first was a screaming call about the sexist employee. The second was about a ranting and raving customer. My manager banned the rude customer and gave me a raise for biting my tongue through it all.)

    The Customer Spent Money But The Child Is Complimentary

    | Chicago, IL, USA | Awesome Customers, Family & Kids

    (I work at a big box store in the jewellery department. I am usually the only one there during the mornings. I am also seven months pregnant. I am helping a lady pick out a new watch, with her younger old daughter sitting in the cart. This happens just as the lady is about to pay for her item.)

    Me: “And here’s your change. Thank you for shopping with us!”

    Lady: “Thank you. Good luck with the future baby!”

    Me: “Thanks!”

    Little Girl: “I bet the baby will be pretty because you are pretty like a princess!”

    Me: “Aww, thanks!”

    (I couldn’t stop smiling after they left. Little girl made my week! And my baby was the prettiest baby in the hospital when she was born – nurses even thought so!)

    Pen Her In For A Discount

    | MI, USA | Awesome Customers, Bizarre, Top

    (I am a cashier at a small chain grocery store in a small town. I am monitoring the self-checkout station when a customer walks up to me.)

    Me: “Is there something I can help you with?”

    Customer: “Hi is [coworker's name] still here?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but he has already left for the evening. Is there something I could assist you with?”

    Customer: “Well, I am so embarrassed. He was my cashier earlier today and he asked me if I gave his pen back to him. I checked my pockets and I thought I did, but when I got home I found it in my purse! Could I leave this with you and you give it to him next time he comes in?”

    Me: *slightly shocked* “Ma’am, you mean to tell me you drove all the way back here to return a pen to my coworker?”

    Customer: “Yes. I told him I hadn’t took it. I feel so bad!”

    Me: “Well that is very kind of you, I am sure he will appreciate it. I will make sure to leave him a note letting him know you returned it. Might I ask how far you had to drive to return it?”

    Customer: “Well, I live in [town about 40 minutes away from store location].”

    Me:What!?”

    Caught On Con-did Camera

    | Orlando, FL, USA | Awesome Customers, Liars & Scammers, Wild & Unruly

    (I am working as a ride attendant for a theme park roller coaster.)

    Me: *over the intercom* “Once the gates have opened completely, you may make your way to the farthest available seat. Please make sure to secure all personal belongings and fasten your seat belt securely.”

    (Two men approach me from the loading gates, one of whom is in a wheelchair.)

    Disabled Guest: “Hey, buddy. You think you could help my friend get me into the seat there?”

    Me: “Uh, sure, I could do that.”

    (His friend wheels him over to the end of a row of seats and puts the brake on his chair.)

    Me: “What do you need me to do?”

    Friend: “You get his feet, I’ll get him from the back.”

    Disabled Guest: “Thanks again.”

    (The disabled guest raises his arms and his friend grabs him around the chest while I lift his feet off the ground and we sidle over to the train car. Suddenly the disabled guest twists his upper body violently and his friend drops him on his rear end.)

    Disabled Guest: “OH, GOD!”

    Friend: “What the f*** did you just do?!”"

    Me: *terrified* “What?”

    Disabled Guest: “F***, s***, f***! I think my back is busted!”

    Friend: *pointing at me, looking all around* “You all saw him! He dropped my buddy on purpose! That’s first-degree assault!”

    Me: “But I didn’t do anything!”

    Disabled Guest: *still pretending to be in pain* “Somebody call an ambulance! Somebody call a lawyer! Call the cops!”

    Friend: *stomping over to stand one inch from me* “You think just ’cause my buddy’s in a wheelchair you can do whatever you f****** want to him? We’re gonna sue the s*** out of your f****** a**!”

    (He shoves me with both hands, but then the guy in the end seat in the row behind the one we were trying to sit the disabled man in yells at them and points his camera phone at them.)

    Camera Guy: “Hey! You leave him alone! I saw what you did! You tried to set him up! He didn’t drop your friend, you did!”

    (The disabledguest, still lying on the ground, abruptly stops yelling in pain.)

    Friend: “F*** you, f**! You can’t prove anything!”

    Camera Guy: “Oh yeah? I got the whole thing on video!” *he waves his phone at them*

    Friend: “Give me that f****** phone!”

    (The disabled guest’s friend lunges for the phone but the other man quickly hands it to his wife two seats over. The friend hits his head on the side of the train car and his extended hand scratches the camera man’s neck.)

    Disabled Guest: “[Friend's name], get the f****** phone, you retard!”

    (The charade begins to fall apart as his friend staggers and clutches his head, which is now bleeding.)

    Friend: *staggering and clutching his head, which is now bleeding* “F*** you!”

    Camera Guy: “Somebody call security! These guys are con artists! I got it all on tape!”

    (I dash around the disabled guest, having to jump as he tries to grab me by the legs, and run back to the intercom.)

    Me: “Security to [roller coaster] loading platform, emergency!”

    (Three security guards armed with night sticks and mace show up only a few seconds later and have to drag the disabled man’s friend away as he was trading kicks with the camera guy and the camera guy’s wife. The camera couple and the two men are both taken to the nearest emergency station, and security makes me go with them. A park official shows up about half an hour later to take statements from everyone involved separately. After I give my statement, I wait alone in a waiting room for some time before a park doctor comes in and tells me the camera couple wants to talk to me. I’m led into their room.)

    Camera Guy: “Hey, I wanted you to know I saw everything that happened. If that guy tries any legal s*** against you, I’ll be a witness.”

    Me: “That would be great of you. I just… I don’t know what’s going on.”

    Camera Guy’s Wife: “This place is full of cheaters and liars; that’s what’s going on.”

    Camera Guy: “D*** right, honey.”

    (The park official walks in again.)

    Camera Guy: “You don’t believe that jacka**’s story, do you?” *points to me* “This guy didn’t do anything wrong. I caught it all on video with my phone if you need proof.”

    Park Official: “That won’t be necessary, sir. We have security cameras all over the park. We saw what those men did.”

    (The two men were banned from the park and the able-bodied one was charged with assault on the camera guy and his wife, who were given a refund on their admission, four additional one-day tickets, vouchers for free meals at any restaurant in the park, and two huge stuffed animals for their kids, all free.)

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