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    Category: Awesome Customers

    Sold-Out Flip-Out

    | MD, USA | Awesome Customers, Crazy Requests, Technology, Top

    (We have started carrying a very popular toy line. We run out as soon as each shipment comes in.)

    Customer #1: “Hey, I’d like to pick up [newest figure in the line], for my son.”

    Me: “I’m sorry; we’re sold out of that one right now. We have another shipment coming in tomorrow. If you’d like to call in the morning, you can check then.”

    Customer #1: “F****** ridiculous! Do you idiots think that this is a proper business model? I know that you have tons of them in the back room. You just put them out a few at a time to create demand!”

    Me: “Trust me! With how fast this series is selling, we would put them on the shelves the moment we could.”

    Customer #1: “Yeah, whatever. And they’re more expensive here than at [competing toy chain] anyway. Also, your displays are too confusing. And these video game displays are nothing but naked girls and guns! This place is disgusting! What message are you trying to send?!”

    (Another customer intervenes.)

    Customer #2: “This is a nation-wide company with thousands of stores. He’s standing behind the cash register on Tuesday night. No offense to him, but even if there was a corporate-wide toy conspiracy, does he look like he’d be in on it?”

    Customer #1: “Still, I’m just… whatever. Idiotic place!”

    (Customer #1 leaves in a huff.)

    Customer #2: “Sorry, I don’t mean to imply that you’re not important.”

    Me: “Oh, you don’t have to apologize. That made my night. Would you like a free poster?”

    I Should Be So Ducky

    | IL, USA | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink, Money

    Me: “Hi, welcome to [fast food place]! How can I help you?”

    Elderly Customer: “Yes. I’ll have a small hamburger, a small fry, and a small coffee, for here, please.”

    Me: “Certainly. Would you like cream and sugar with your coffee?”

    Elderly Customer: “Of course. Two cream, and two sugar, please.”

    Me: “Your total is $[total].”

    (The Elderly Customer hands me more than enough to cover the meal.)

    Elderly Customer: “Keep the change.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir. We’re not allowed to take tips.”

    Elderly Customer: “Really? What’s this world coming to! Customers should be allowed to tip for good service.”

    Me: “I’m really sorry about that, sir. Here’s your food. Is there anything else that you would like?”

    Elderly Customer: “No, thanks.”†

    (He takes his food off to the lobby. A short while later, he’s back at my register.)

    Me: “Did you need a refill on your coffee, sir?”

    Elderly Customer: “Yes, please.”

    (I refill his coffee. When I return with his cup, he takes it, smiles at me, and leaves the store. Sitting on the counter where he was standing, is a small balloon duck. The duck has a note.)

    Note: “This isn’t a tip; he’s a gift. I hope that he brings a smile to your face.”

    Guessing Is A Whiskey Business

    | UK | Awesome Customers, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

    (An elderly customer comes in. I’ve never seen him before in nearly two years of working there.)

    Customer: “I’d like a bottle of whiskey, please.”

    Me: “Okay, which one would you like?”

    Customer: “Well, I don’t know…”

    (I step to the side so he has a better view of the whiskey, but he just continues to stare at me. A few seconds pass…)

    Me: “Have you decided?”

    (The customer becomes irate.)

    Customer: “No, I haven’t decided! I was waiting for you to tell me!”

    Me: “Pardon?”

    Customer: “I was waiting for you to tell me what I want.”

    (I start listing the brands and prices for each bottle.)

    Customer: “No! I don’t care about any of that! Just tell me what I want!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir. I’m not sure what size bottle you’re after, or brand, or even how much money you have on you.”

    Customer: “USELESS! You lot are supposed to be here to help. I don’t know why I bothered coming here! Every time I come here, you lot never help me! You’re all USELESS!”

    (He storms out the shop. I begin to serve the next customer.)

    Customer #2: “Well, that was weird! Anyway, I’d like some wine please.”

    Me: “Okay, would you like any wine in particular?”

    Customer #2: “I don’t know, red wine? Can’t you just tell me what I want?! You’re so useless! WHY WON’T YOU JUST READ MY MIND AND TELL ME WHAT I WANT?! DO I EVEN LIKE RED WINE?!”

    (He pretends to storm out the shop. That guy never fails to cheer us up!)

    Getting Into Her Good Books

    | New Zealand | Awesome Customers, Books & Reading

    (I am checking out a friendly, talkative lady. We discover we both are avid readers, and discuss the pros and cons of e-readers. I offer her a free internet code to download a book onto her e-reader, just because she’s being so nice.)

    Customer: “Is it okay to leave my bags here for an hour or two?”

    Me: “Of course! Leave them for as long as you like.”

    Customer: “Thanks!”

    (She comes back later, and drops a very expensive new release book on the counter.)

    Me: “Sorry, I don’t understand?”

    Customer: “It’s for you! I’ve finished it already. I don’t have the space to take it back. Besides, after the internet code, I have a book to read on the plane anyway!”

    Me: “Oh! This is really just too kind. I couldn’t!”

    Customer: “Nonsense! Thank you so much for your help this morning. I remembered you said how much you loved a real book, so here you are. Have a wonderful day!”

    (It wasn’t the gift that choked me up. It was the fact she had actually listened and paid attention to our conversations that was so heart warming. Thank you lovely lady!)

    They’re Game To Play A Game To Win The Game

    | Cincinnati, OH, USA | Awesome Customers, Bizarre, Geeks Rule

    (A customer approaches me. She is holding a rather rare DS game.)

    Customer #1: “Hey, do you guys happen to have another copy of this game in stock?”

    Me: “No, sorry. It’s not too often that we come across this one. It’s quite the gem.”

    Customer #1: “D***. See, I want this game, but so does she.”

    (She motions to another customer, Customer #2, standing next to the game shelf.)

    Customer #1: “I guess we’ll have to settle this somehow.”

    Me: “Um… just don’t get violent, okay?”

    Customer #1: “Oh, we won’t!”

    (After a bit of talking, the two come over to the counter.)

    Customer #2: “Do you mind if we use your counter for a bit?”

    Me: “I guess so.”

    (The two customers stare at each other for a bit. Suddenly, they break into the most heated arm wrestling match I have ever witnessed in my life. Customer #1 barely struggles, and defeats Customer #2 very easily.)

    Customer #2: “What? How did you do that?”

    Customer #1: “I work in a kennel. Handling 100-pound dogs will give you a bit of arm strength!”

    (The defeated customer leaves the store. I ring Customer #1 out. After she leaves, I start talking to my coworker.)

    Me: “Dude. What just happened?”

    Coworker: “I have no f****** idea.”

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