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    Category: Awesome Customers

    Please Keep All Cybernetics Inside The Ride At All Times

    | Orlando, FL, USA | Awesome Customers, Family & Kids, Themed Giveaway, Top, Wild & Unruly

    (I work as an attendant for a theme park roller coaster. We have had an incident where a guest’s $10,000, custom-made prosthetic leg fell off while he was riding the coaster and landed in the moat below. Thanks to that, the park changed their policy to not allow anyone to bring a prosthetic limb onto any ride; now they must be stored in lockers with other personal belongings.)

    Me: “How many in your party, sir?”

    Guest: “Two.”

    Me: “Row three, please. Right this way.”

    Guest: “Hold on.”

    (He bends over, unsnaps something, pulls his leg out of his jeans, straightens up and hands it to me.)

    Me: “Uh…”

    Guest: “Could you hold onto this while I ride?”

    Me: *unable to take my eyes off the prosthetic being offered* “I, uh… I’m sorry, sir. You’ll have to store that in the lockers out front.”

    Guest: “You mean I have to go through the whole line again?”

    Me: *visibly shivering* “You, um, I mean, I can give you a pass to let you back into the leg -I mean- front of the line.”

    Guest: “Well, that sure is a pain.”

    (He starts hobbling around to put his leg back on, when new guests start coming down the queue. At the front of the line is a little boy, maybe 6 or 7 years old, and his mother.)

    Little Boy: *wide-eyed and pointing at the one-legged man* “Look, mommy! That man’s a robot!”

    Mother: “You’re making that man feel bad. You apologize to him!”

    Little Boy: *suddenly terrified* “Is he gonna shoot me with his lasers?”

    Guest: *in a silly computer-like voice* “DON’T WORRY, YOUNG HUMAN PERSON. I ONLY SHOOT BAD GUYS WITH MY LASERS. BEEP BOOP.”

    Little Boy: “Whoooooaaaaaa!”

    Reaching The Tipping Point

    | Princeton, NJ, USA | Awesome Customers, Money

    (It’s our delivery day at the store, and most of the employees are unloading onto the shelves. The store is very busy with customers. I’m stocking shelves when an older gentleman walks into my aisle.)

    Me: “Good evening. Can I help you find anything?”

    Customer: “Oh, no thank you, I’m doing alright. I appreciate you asking, though.”

    (I go back to stacking when the customer comes down to my end of the aisle.)

    Customer: “Thank you very much!”

    (As he says this, he reaches for my hand, and I think that I’m holding what it was he was looking for. When I look down, however, I see he’s placed a five dollar bill in my hand instead.)

    Me: “Oh, uh…”

    Customer: *with a smile* “Every little bit helps!”

    (Before I can say anything, he walks away. A little while later, I get called up to the registers. While there, I see the same gentleman has just finished his purchase. A coworker of mine walks up to join me.)

    Coworker: “Hey, see that guy over there? I was in the aisles just now and he came up to shake my hand and thank me for helping him. In his hand was five bucks!”

    Me: “Wow, that’s really nice!”

    Coworker: “The thing is, I helped him last time he was here, but I didn’t do anything this time. I wonder if he’s been going up to all of us like that.”

    Me: “Sounds like it.”

    (Just then, we notice two carts full of shopping bags sitting alone, near where the gentleman had been standing a moment ago.)

    Coworker: “I think those must be his carts.”

    Me: “That’ll take him a couple trips. Why don’t we take these out to him?”

    (My coworker and I wheel the carts out to the parking lot, where we see the customer loading his car on the far side. We bring them over to him.)

    Customer: “Oh, thank you! I don’t normally shop like this, but I had a lot of stuff to get this time. I can take care of it from here.”

    Me: “All right, sir. You have a good night!”

    (Later on, we checked with some of the other employees; as we suspected, he had gone around and tipped all the employees!)

    Failing To Register

    | Bowie, MD, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Bad Behavior, Themed Giveaway, Top

    (It’s early morning and we have just two people working, one person to take money, the other to get the order. This is how we are trained to work, and we function quickly and efficiently this way. A regular customer has begun complaining about the way we run the bakery every day she comes in, and has tried several times to cut in line. On this day, she cuts in front of another customer I’m serving to complain yet again.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but she is ordering with me right now. It’ll be just a moment.”

    Regular: *steps off in a huff* “Why are two people helping one customer? You need to open another register.”

    (After the other customer is done, the regular rushes to my register again.)

    Me: “Good morning.”

    Regular: “Why do you need two people to help one person? It’s bad business!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. What would you like today?”

    Regular: *gives her order* “You people have become so slow! You used to be good, but recently you’ve been giving really terrible service.”

    (I want to explain that this is the slowest month of the year, and the management has cut the amount of staff in half to accommodate for the lack of business and ease up on labor costs, but I don’t want to start an argument.)

    Me: *repeats her order* “Would you like anything else today, ma’am?”

    Regular: “No. You need to have more registers open, it’s bad business!”

    Me: “That’ll be [price]; for here or to go?”

    (She gives me the money as she continues to rant about how slow we’ve gotten and then turns away in a huff. Meanwhile, there’s another regular, a city police officer, who is sitting at the table immediately next to my register. She stands up and watches the regular stomp away.)

    Officer: “Somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.”

    Me: *whispering* “She’s like that every day!”

    Officer: “Really?”

    (I turn and discover that the first regular has flagged down my manager, and is continuing her rant loudly.)

    Me: *still whispering* “Oh, great, now she’s harassing him.”

    Officer: *loudly and in the regular’s direction* “There is nothing wrong with how these young ladies run this business! Leave them alone! If you have a problem with them or this establishment, you can go somewhere else!”

    (All I could do was stare as the regular leaves with her food as quickly as possible; I haven’t seen her since!)

    Always Jump At The Chance For Fun

    | CT, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Bizarre, Top

    (A customer in her forties comes through my line, and we exchange pleasantries as I ring her out. It’s a perfectly normal interaction.)

    Me: “Do you have your [store] rewards card?”

    Customer: “No, I don’t believe I have one.”

    Me: “Well, would you like to sign up?”

    (The customer agrees and I walk her through the process. Everything goes smoothly and at the end, I scan her new card and hand it to her.)

    Me: “There you go!”

    Customer: “Yay!”

    (Suddenly, the customer starts jumping up and down in joy, waving her hands and looking for all the world like an ecstatic six year old. This goes on for a while and, not knowing what else to do, I wind up jumping with her. Just as suddenly as she started, she calms down and stops jumping.)

    Woman: “There, wasn’t that exciting? Now you’ll be cheery for the whole rest of the day!”

    (I certainly was!)

    This Customer Is Alright

    | Lexington, KY, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Bad Behavior

    (Note: I am the shift supervisor. We’re very busy, and I’m on my way to help a customer find something when one of my coworkers stops me.)

    Coworker: “[My name], how long can we hold things for customers?”

    Me: “We can probably hold that until the end of the day tomorrow.”

    Customer #1: “I need you to hold this until Monday.” (Note: it’s currently Friday.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I can’t do that. Store policy is that we can only hold things until the end of business on the same day, so I’m already bending the rules by holding it for an extra day.”

    Customer #1: “But I need you to hold it until Monday! You’re having a big sale starting Monday, and I want this at the sale price!”

    Me: “Again, I’m very sorry, ma’am, but I simply can’t hold it that long.”

    Customer #1: “That’s terrible! You should hold it for me!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, I really can’t. Excuse me, please; I need to go help this woman who has been patiently waiting for me.” *to Customer #2* “What can I help you with?”

    (As Customer #2 and I start walking away, she speaks to me.)

    Customer #2: “Man, what a b**** that woman was!”

    Me: *stifling a laugh* “I would never say that.”

    Customer #2: “Well, I’m another customer, so I can say it!”


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