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    Category: Pets & Animals

    Would dogs be mans best friend if they realized they are sometimes more intelligent than their owners? Sadly in the world stupid people are allowed to own pets, find out how it can all go horrible wrong from here. Even wild animals cannot escape!

    Something Smells Fishy, Part 2

    | Canton, MI, USA | Pets & Animals

    (I’m working in the pet department, cleaning out the dead fish in the tanks. A small girl, probably about 5 or 6, approaches me.)

    Girl: “Are you taking care of the fish?”

    Me: “Yes, I am.”

    Girl: *noticing the dead fish* “There’s a dead fish in there!”

    Me: “Yeah, I’m taking care of the dead fish.”

    Girl: “What are you doing with the dead fish?!”

    Me: “No, I’m—”

    Girl: “STOP KILLING ALL THE FISHES!”

    (Thankfully, the mother comes and grabs her, apologizes profusely, and quickly walks away.)

    Related:
    Something Smells Fishy

    1 Part Bleach To 100 Parts Stupidity

    | Avondale, PA, USA | Extra Stupid, Pets & Animals, Top

    Me: “How are you today? I’m told you needed help with fish?”

    Customer: “Yeah, all my fish died after I cleaned my tank yesterday. My husband says that it may have had to do with me using bleach, but I told him he was wrong.”

    Me: “Well, actually he is right. Bleach leaves residue on the glass. Even after rinsing it, that can kill the fish.”

    Customer: “But I didn’t even rinse it.”

    Me: “What did you do, then?”

    Customer: “I just added it to the water. How could that kill them?”

    No, It’s Because The Owner Is Stupid

    | London, UK | Pets & Animals

    (A man brings his dog into our supermarket.)

    Coworker: “I’m sorry, but there are no dogs allowed inside unless it is a service dog.”

    Customer: *with straight face* “It’s because my dog is black, isn’t it? I could sue you!”

    Woofing Vicariously

    | Tennessee, USA | Pets & Animals

    (A customer brings in two Chihuahuas for nail trims.)

    Customer: “The male will need to be muzzled.”

    (The groomer prefers not to muzzle a dog unless absolutely necessary, but gets the correctly-sized muzzle, and put it on the dog as requested. The dog struggles a bit, but is not unduly stressed.)

    Customer: *screaming* “Take it off! Take it off! It’s too tight! I’m claustrophobic!”

    Human Tested, Dog Approved

    | Annapolis, MD, USA | Food & Drink, Pets & Animals

    (A man and woman come to my register with a cart full of dog products. They have no dog with them, but the man notices the bowl of dog treats we keep at the registers for dogs who come into the store.)

    Man: “Can I have one of those?”

    Me: “Sure, go ahead.”

    Man: *takes a dog treat from the bowl and eats it*

    Me: “Sir?!”

    Woman: “Don’t worry, he’s tried dog treats before.”

    Man: “Yeah, this one tasted like s***.”

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