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    Category: Pets & Animals

    Would dogs be mans best friend if they realized they are sometimes more intelligent than their owners? Sadly in the world stupid people are allowed to own pets, find out how it can all go horrible wrong from here. Even wild animals cannot escape!

    Her Bark Is As Bad As Her Bite

    , | NSW, Australia | Bizarre, Food & Drink, Pets & Animals

    (I usually work in the drive-thru of our store.  At least once a day, often twice, a regular customer comes through. We all recognise her car.  She has a chihuahua that sits on her lap that snaps at us whenever we reach near the car.)

    Coworker: “It’s her again. Please, will you hand out her coffee? I’m so scared of that dog!”

    (I walk to the window and hold the regular’s food out, but far enough from her car that the dog can’t get close to me.)

    Me: “Good morning!  Here’s your food, and I’ll just grab your coffee. ”

    (I hold out the coffee, again further away from her car than normal. Suddenly, the dog lunges and almost bites my hand. I accidentally drop the coffee as I jump back, away from her and the dog.)

    Customer: *to her dog* “My poor darling, my baby! Oh, are you okay? Did the mean lady scare you? Did she burn you with the hot coffee?” *to me* “If you burnt my dog, I’ll get your stupid a** fired!”

    Me: “I’m very sorry. I’ll replace your coffee right away, but just a suggestion: perhaps this wouldn’t happen if you sat your dog in the passenger’s seat?”

    Customer: “The nerve you have, thinking you know how to look after my precious little pumpkin! She’s MY dog, not yours! MUMMA KNOWS WHAT’S BEST!”

    (I quickly grab the coffee, and hold it as far away from her and the dog as I can.)

    Customer: *snatches her drink and drives off*

    Coworker: *to me* “Sorry!”

    Better Keep Him At Arm’s Length

    | Philadelphia, PA, USAPhiladelphia, PA, USA | Pets & Animals

    (I work at an aquarium. I am petting one of the starfishes in the touch tank when a middle-aged man comes up to the tank. A coworker working the tank is telling us facts about starfishes).

    Coworker: “A really interesting aspect about these guys is that if one of their arms was severed, they could grow another one.”

    Middle-aged Man: “So, you mean that if I cut off one of its arms it would grow right back?”

    Coworker: “Well yes, but—”

    Middle-aged Man: “What if I cut off TWO of its arms? Would they still grow back?”

    Coworker: “Well, I’m—”

    Middle-aged Man: “I know! I will cut off ALL of its arms! Let’s see if it can rebound from that!”

    Coworker: *freaked out* “Thank you for all the interest everyone, but the touch tank is now closed for the day!” *moves all the starfish back towards him and closes the tank*

    Keep Your Paws Off Our Pups

    | Scotland, UK | Awesome Customers, Pets & Animals

    (I’m a volunteer at an animal shelter. People can pay a small donation to come and see our animals. One day I’m returning a dog to its kennel when a customer approaches me.)

    Customer: “This is ridiculous! I want to see your manager!”

    Me: “Um, I’m just volunteer here, sir. If you speak to somebody in reception—”

    Customer: “Rubbish! You’re just making excuses! I paid my donation to see your dogs and I can only get into one block. The other three are closed! I know you have more dogs!”

    Me: “We close three blocks for the dogs’ welfare, sir. If you’re interested in—”

    Customer: “I don’t give a f*** about the dogs’ welfare! I want to see more dogs! You have no customer service at all, do you?!”

    (On hearing this, another customer approaches and gives the very rude customer a £5 note.)

    Another Customer: “Here’s £5; consider it a refund. Because I can tell you, sir, they would absolutely NOT allow you anywhere near their animals with that attitude!”

    Guess Who’s Flapping To Dinner

    | Ottawa, ON, Canada | Crazy Requests, Pets & Animals

    Customer: “This may sound odd, but we’re looking for a light with a finish that’s resistant to…um…bird poop.”

    Me: “I’m guessing you have a pet? Well, no finish is going to stand up completely to that kind of thing, but we can look at a few things. What kind of light are you looking for?”

    Customer: “It’s for over our kitchen table.”

    (I proceed to find them some lights. Later on as I’m helping them out to their car…)

    Me: “Oh, I never did ask the name of your bird!”

    Customer: “Well, we have about 70 of them. Bye!” *drives off*

    Coworker: “Remind me not to accept any of their dinner invitations.”

    Ceiling Cat Is Watching You

    | USA | Pets & Animals

    Customer: “Hello?”

    Me: “Hi there, my name is Charlie—”

    Customer: “Charlie’s a boy’s name! You’re a girl!”

    Me: “Yes, sir. Anyway, I’m calling from [company name] to talk to you about the new security system we’re offering.”

    Customer: “I don’t need it.”

    Me: “Are you sure? It’s really nifty and it has all sorts of special features if you’d allow me to describe them.”

    Customer: “Nah. I’ve got my girlfriend’s cat.”

    Me: “A…cat, sir?”

    Customer: “Yeah. Any time anyone comes in the house, he won’t leave them alone until they feed him. He’s really cute, but it’s the most irritating thing ever. They’d get annoyed and leave!”

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