Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Making A Mute Point
    (2,386 thumbs up)
  • April Themed Story Giveaway: Creepy Customers!
    Submit your story today!

    Category: Pets & Animals

    Would dogs be mans best friend if they realized they are sometimes more intelligent than their owners? Sadly in the world stupid people are allowed to own pets, find out how it can all go horrible wrong from here. Even wild animals cannot escape!

    Let There Be Unhappy Feet

    | San Antonio, TX, USA | Crazy Requests, Pets & Animals

    (I am working at the penguin exhibit during the summer.)

    Guest: “Hey, why are all the lights off?”

    Me: “The penguins are from the Southern Hemisphere, so it’s winter for them. Therefore, we have the lights off for most of the day in order to simulate the dark Antarctic winter environment.”

    Guest: “Well, I don’t think it’s healthy for them to be in the dark so long. You should release them back to the wild and into the light.”

    Me: “Ma’am, like I said, it is dark in Antarctica right now too. If we released them there, they would still be in the dark.”

    Guest: “Whatever… it’s just not healthy! They need to see the light!” *pauses* “You forgot to pay your electric bill, didn’t you?”

    Me: “What? No! Of course we pay our electric bills. All the lights are on in the park! However, in order to keep our penguins happy, we have to keep it dark in the summer.”

    Guest: “Don’t lie! I can’t believe you are keeping these fish in such drab conditions! Next time, pay your electric bill!”

    Me: *speechless*

    Cut Price Cut-Throats

    | MI, USA | Bad Behavior, Liars & Scammers, Money, Pets & Animals, Themed Giveaway

    (It is standard grooming salon policy to make sure the customer is completely satisfied with their dog’s haircut before they leave. If not, we will fix what we can. I am returning a dog to its owner.)

    Me: “Here he is, ma’am! Are you happy with the haircut?”

    Customer: *examining dog* “Hmm… well… he looks okay except for the hair above his eyes is still a little too long.”

    Me: “Oh, I’m sorry about that. Would you like me to trim it a bit more? It’ll only take a minute.”

    Customer: “No!”

    Me: “Okay then, if you’re sure, that will be [price].”

    Customer: “But that’s full price! You can’t charge me full price, because the hair above his eyes is too long!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I offered to trim it for you. I can still do that; it’ll just take a minute.”

    Customer: “No!”

    Me: “Well then, it’ll be the same price I just told you.”

    Customer: “But that isn’t fair! The hair above his eyes is still too long! I want a discount!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’ve offered to fix the hair above his eyes for you, but you’ve refused. I cannot give you a discount for something that I am willing and able to fix right here and now.”

    Customer: “Well, did I say too long? I meant it was too short! It’s too short! You can’t fix that now, can you!? I want a discount!”

    (She proceeded to throw a tantrum for the next ten minutes and only paid up and left when I threatened to call the police on her. Needless to say, she and her dog are no longer welcome back.)

    Paging Charlotte On Aisle 5

    | NJ, USA | Pets & Animals, Wild & Unruly

    (I am at the cashier, ringing up a long line of people. I notice when customers walk in, they suddenly skirt around the theft detectors. A lady approaches the counter.)

    Lady: “There is a big spider in the entrance!”

    (Note: I don’t want to leave the counter because of the enormous line.)

    Me: “Okay, cool.”

    Lady: “You have to kill it. You work here.”

    Me: “It’s not hurting anyone.”

    (The lady’s husband chimes in.)

    Husband: “Kill it, she’s right!”

    (Everyone in the line seems to agree with the lady and her husband.)

    Me: “Okay, I’ll just move it outside.”

    Husband: “No, kill it!”

    Me: “No, it wont do any harm out there in the parking lot.”

    (I move the spider outside.)

    Lady: “I can’t take it anymore!”

    Me: “Can’t take what?”

    (Suddenly, the lady grabs a basket made for carrying products outside and finds the spider. She starts violently smashing the red basket on the spider.)

    Lady: “Why is it not dying?!”

    (It turns out the basket has little legs on the bottom, preventing it from making contact with the spider. She eventually figures this out and kills it, but not before it charges her one last time and causes her to flip out!)

    Weekly Roundup: Cat-astrophic Customers

    | Not Always Right | Pets & Animals, Roundups

    Cat-astrophic Customers! U can haz LOL (& OMG) with this week’s selection of cat-themed customer stories!

    1. No Paws For Thought (4,465 thumbs up)
      We’re not sure what’s more desperate: the bus passenger who can’t bring her cat, or the employee who can’t hang up on her!
    2. Curiosity Feeds The Cat (2,340 thumbs up)
      What a meow-ron: No, your cat doesn’t need to match the one on the cat food packaging.
    3. Models Are Always Catty (3,051 thumbs up)
      We all think our cats are model kitties, but this picky customer thinks cats literally come in models!
    4. A Victim Of Fur-Ball Abuse (2,704 thumbs up)
      This ridiculous owner is definitely “fanciful” if she thinks she can exchange cats willy-nilly.
    5. Not Quite The Cat’s Meow (3,977 thumbs up)
      Strays deserve love, too—but customers need to ensure they’re the correct species first!

    PS #1: check out our new Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news galore!

    PS #2: Read more roundups here!

    1-800-WE-R-NICE

    | MO, USA | Awesome Workers, Pets & Animals

    (Our medical device company has an 800 number that is one digit off from another company, which sells skin care products. We therefore get a lot of wrong numbers.)

    Me: “Good morning, [medical devices company], how may I help you?”

    Elderly Lady: “Hello? I need to order some cream. I have a terrible rash on my bottom.”

    Me: “I’m sorry ma’am, but we are [medical devices company], not [skin care company]. I can give you their number.”

    Elderly Lady: “But this rash is terrible! I live in Florida and the heat makes it worse!”

    Me: “I’m sorry to hear that. If you want to write down the—”

    Elderly Lady: “It’s very red and sore! I live alone, you know. My husband died a few years ago. I really need some cream!”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am. But we don’t sell that. Their number is almost the same—”

    Elderly Lady: “I have a cat. Do you like cats?”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am. I do.”

    Elderly Lady: “His name is Buster. He is old like me.”

    (She seems lonely, so I decide to just talk to her for a while. I finally manage to give her the other number.)

    Lady: “Thank you, sweetheart. You are a very nice young lady!” *hangs up*


    Page 20/49First...1819202122...Last