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  • Getting Owned By The Owner, Part 7
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    Category: Pets & Animals

    Would dogs be mans best friend if they realized they are sometimes more intelligent than their owners? Sadly in the world stupid people are allowed to own pets, find out how it can all go horrible wrong from here. Even wild animals cannot escape!

    It Has A Few Bugs In It

    | MA, USA | Health & Body, Pets & Animals, Technology

    (A customer comes in with a weather station, where there’s a small transmitter that goes outside to give you the outside temperature, and a bigger receiver that goes inside to show you the indoor temperature and what the transmitter is saying the outdoor temperature is. The transmitter isn’t working properly and is saying “LL” instead of a temperature. When a customer comes in with anything they claim doesn’t work, we have to troubleshoot.)

    Me: “All right. The transmitter runs on batteries, so I’m gonna swap them out and see if that’s the problem.”

    Customer: “Oh, those are brand new. I don’t see why that would be a problem.”

    Me: “Well, sometimes it just happens, so let’s look.”

    (I open the transmitter and take out the batteries, when something small and white falls out.)

    Customer: “What’s that?”

    Me: “…sir, I think those are maggots.”

    Customer: “Well, how did those get in there?”

    Me: “Bugs tend to go wherever its warm, and the transmitter must have been giving off heat.”

    (The customer then proceeds to bang the transmitter on the counter, trying to get out all the maggots. Now the counter covered in maggots and I’m starting to feel sick.)

    Me: “All right, sir, maybe I should take one more look at it.”

    (I took the transmitter back from the customer and went to look in the battery pack, when I saw spiders start to crawl out towards me. I dropped the transmitter on the counter and ran into the back to have a panic attack alone. I came back out and the customer is still there, talking to my coworker, and wanting to get the device replaced. We told him no. Lucky for us, he left his maggot and spider infested product with us.)

    Say Neigh To Demanding Customers, Part 2

    | Australia | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Pets & Animals

    (I work for a large adventure playground which is situated in a park. We are strictly a ‘no pets allowed’ establishment; however, the park is popular with dog walkers and is used for obedience and agility classes, so it is a common occurrence to have people come along with their dogs and get frustrated when we have to turn them away. In this situation I am overhearing one of my coworkers speaking on the phone.)

    Coworker #1: “Yes, ma’am, I understand.”

    (Pause.)

    Coworker #1: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but our playground has a strict ‘no pets allowed’ policy.”

    (Longer pause.)

    Coworker #1: “I’m sorry to hear that, but we really can’t make exceptions.”

    (Pause.)

    Coworker #1: “Ye—” *pause* “But I—” *pause* “We—” *pause* “No, th—” *pause*

    (This carries on for some time, until eventually my coworker seems to give up.)

    Coworker #1: *speaking very loudly* “YES, MA’AM, I UNDERSTAND. I’M SORRY WE COULDN’T WORK THINGS OUT. HAVE A NICE DAY.”

    (He hangs up the phone with force and drops his head to the counter.)

    Coworker #2: “Another person wanting to bring their puppy in, huh?”

    Coworker #1: “No. She wanted to bring her HORSE.”

    Related:
    Say Neigh To Demanding Customers

    As Sick As A Parrot

    | New York City, NY, USA | Family & Kids, Health & Body, Pets & Animals

    (My friend is a small-mammal handler at a zoo. Today, she’s taken a particularly docile ferret out to let visitors encounter it first-hand. A couple comes in with a young child. I’m standing in the background.)

    Mother: “Ooh, look, the zoo lady’s got a baby raccoon!”

    Father: “That’s some sort of weasel!”

    Child: “Mom, I wanna see the octopus.”

    Mother: “Let’s go see the nice lady with the raccoon.”

    Father: “Weasel.”

    (The mother gives the father a look and then approaches my friend.)

    Mother: “‘Excuse me, miss, what kind of animal is that?”

    Friend: “This is a ferret. Her name is [Name] and she’s very friendly. You can pet her if you take care to avoid—”

    Father: “Parrot!? That’s a weasel!”

    Friend: “It’s a ferret. They’re in the weasel family, like—”

    Father: “You sure?”

    Friend: “Yes, very sure. Ferrets are among—”

    Father: “Let’s go see the octopus, [Child].”

    (They leave in a hurry. Curious, I follow them outside.)

    Father: “D*** thing must have been sick. Pretty irresponsible of them to expose us to a sick parrot.”

    Child: “Ferret.”

    Father: “We just saw the parrot. I thought you wanted to see the octopus.”

    Child: “Daddy, is your hearing aid on?”

    It’s A Grey(hound) Area

    , | Calgary, AB, Canada | Pets & Animals, Theme Of The Month, Transportation

    (I was working in the call centre for a well-known bus company named after a type of dog. An ad was running at the time for a companion fare (buy one, get one) and it featured images of the type of dog the company is named after. One afternoon I get a call in regards to the pricing and rules for the fare. After giving this info the caller has one last question:)

    Caller: “So, to use this companion fare, does my companion HAVE to be a dog?”

    Out Back Fishing

    | Nanuet, NY, USA | Crazy Requests, Pets & Animals

    (I’m the manager on duty. At the time I’m back in the aquatics department feeding the fish when a customer approaches.)

    Me: “Hello. Can I help you with anything, Ma’am?”

    Customer: *points to one of the tanks* “Do you have any more of these in the back?”

    Me: *I assume she’s gesturing to the fake plants, which we sell* “Possibly, but we also have them out on the floor. I can show you the aisle.”

    (I take her over to the decor aisle.)

    Customer: “No, not those!” *walks back over to the tank, jabbing her finger at the glass*  ”Those!”

    Me: “The… fish?”

    Customer: “Yes!”

    Me: “I’m… sorry. But, ah… no. These tanks are the only place we keep the fish. I don’t put them in the stockroom.”

    Customer: *huffs and walks away*

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