That’s A Stormy Relationship

(My boyfriend is from Florida, and we live together in my home state, Texas. After grocery shopping and putting groceries away, my boyfriend pulls out a pineapple.)

Fiancée: “Look, it’s hair is bent!” *the tuft or whatever on top of the pineapple is crooked to the side, almost lying flat* “It looks like it was in a hurricane!”

Me: “Oh, honey, so that’s what pineapples from Florida look like! I always wanted to see one!”

(He flips me the bird from behind his back as he’s walking away.)

Me: “Backwards?!”

Fiancée: “Yeah, that’s how we flip people off in Florida… We can’t turn around, or we might miss something flying at us during a hurricane!”