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    Bananas About The Boob Tube

    | Northampton, UK |

    (I work in the home insurance department for a large insurer. We offer standard Buildings and Contents with an optional add-on of Home Emergency. This is for burst pipes, boilers going down, etc.)

    Me: “Good afternoon, you’re through to [name]. How can I help you today?”

    Customer: “I’ve just bought a new TV. Is it covered under my Contents insurance?”

    Me: “Yes, it will be covered under Contents.”

    Customer: “And is it covered under Home Emergency?”

    Me: “Sorry, how do you mean?”

    Customer: *sighs* “I MEAN, how long will it take for you to get a replacement television out to me if this one stops working?”

    Me: “Um…unfortunately your television is not covered under Home Emergency.”

    Customer: “Why not?!”

    Me: “We don’t class a broken television as an emergency.”

    Customer: “Well I do, and I know I’m right! What do I do if my television breaks and I can’t watch my programmes? GOD D*** PHONE MONKEYS!” *hangs up*