Customer: “I’d like to return these knives.”

Me: “Okay, was there anything wrong with them at all?”

Customer: “Well, they were very sharp and my wife cut herself.”

Me: “Sir, knives are usually sharp. Unfortunately, because you’ve used them there is nothing I can do.”

Customer: “But they were extremely sharp! We were hoping to find a set that wasn’t so…sharp?”

Me: “So you’re looking for a set of dull knives?”

Customer: “Yes, do you have any that are more dull than this?”

Me: “No…have a nice day!”