(The phone rings five minutes before the end of the school day.)

Parent: *very distressed* “You’ll have to help me, please help!”

Me: “What on earth has happened? How can I help?”

Parent: “It’s an emergency! There’s been a disaster! You have to help me!”

Me: “Calm down and tell me what has happened. I’ll do my best to help”.

Parent: “I can’t get there to pick up [name of her child]. It’s an emergency!”

Me: “Don’t worry about her, I’ll keep an eye on her here at school. She can come home with me if need be. Is there anything else can do? What has happened?”

Parent: “It’s my hair, it’s turned out orange!”