(I work in a toy store in a local mall. One day a man comes in and stands awkwardly to one side for a long while. I realize that something is…off about him, mentally. Finally, he approaches me.)

Me: “Hi, how may I help you today?”

Customer: “Have you seen Bellatrix Lestrange?”

Me: “We don’t carry any Harry Potter toys, but you might be able to find some Harry Potter stuff at Hot Topic.”

Customer: *looking completely serious* “No, I’m looking for Bellatrix. I’ve already killed Malfoy and now I’m looking for that b****.”