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    Altruism, How I Miss Thee

    | New Zealand |

    Library patron: “I’ve donated a lot of books over the years. So, from now on I’d like all my requests for free, please.”

    (Requests to transfer books from one library branch to another cost $1 per time.)

    Me: “I’m sorry. We don’t have any policy to do that.”

    Library patron: “I’ve donated so many books over the years I think this is a special case! I should be given free requests and fines.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, that’s not something you’ll be able to do. A lot of people donate books and we don’t give them free requests and fines.”

    Library patron: “But I’ve been supporting the library with all these donations I’ve been giving. I deserve something in return!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but the word donation implies you expect nothing in return… otherwise, it’s not a donation.”

    Library patron: *lightbulb goes on* “Oh…”