October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

A Poser By Any Other Name, Part 2

| Newark, NJ, USA | At The Checkout, Liars & Scammers, Money, Uncategorized

(I’m not working, but I’m shopping. I’m at the register when the man in front of me starts yelling at the cashier at the top of his lungs.)

Customer: “You can’t do this, d*** it! My coupons are good! Take them!”

Cashier: “Sir, these coupons are expired. I’m not allowed–”

Customer: “If you don’t take it, you’re gonna be expired! Take my coupons or I’ll sue! I’m a lawyer! I’ll sue you in court!”

(I tap him on the shoulder.)

Customer: “WHAT?!”

Me: *calmly* “Are you a prosecutor or defense attorney?”

Customer: “W-what?”

Me: “Are you with the state, or private firm?”

Customer: “What?”

Me: “Where did you go to law school?”


Me: “Sir, impersonating an agent of the state is a serious offense. Furthermore, there are enough witnesses and evidence to hold you in court for harassment, threatening, disorderly conduct and disturbing the peace. I’m a prosecutor. I’m with the state. My recommendation? You leave, before I make all this official.”

(The customer runs out of the store, leaving half paid-for groceries behind. The cashier is grinning.)

Cashier: “You want some free stuff?”

A Poser By Any Other Name