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    A Nation Of Size Queens

    | Niagara Falls, Ontario, Canada |

    (I work at a tourist information booth set up along the path by Niagara Falls.)

    Tourist: “Excuse me, ma’am. How do I get to the falls from here?”

    Me: “The Falls? They’re just behind me. That one is the Canadian Falls, also known as the Horseshoe Falls, and that other one’s the American Falls. ”

    Tourist: “Why is the Cay-nay-dian Falls bigger than ours?”

    Me: “Geography, I suppose.”

    Tourist: “I think you have it wrong. The big one MUST be the American one.”

    Me: “No, that one is the Canadian Falls.”

    Tourist: “This is insane! I’m going to write my congressman and demand that that there big falls should be ours! You Cay-Nay-Dians shouldn’t have the big one!”

    Me: “You’re going to annex our Falls? Really?”

    Tourist: “H*** yes I am! I have more of a right to it than you do!”

    Me: “But… it’s in my country.”

    Tourist: “Well, we’ll just see about that!” *storms off*