Customer: “I’d like a GRAHN-DAY coffee. ”

Me: “Anything else sir?”

Customer: “This isn’t a grande!”

Me: “You’re ordering using our competitor’s terms, sir. Their grande is our medium.”

Customer: “Grande! Grande! BIG! Don’t you speak Spanish?!”

Me: “Si senor, hablo espanol. Quiere algo mas?”

Customer: “Huh?”

Me: “Didn’t you just ask if I spoke Spanish?”

Customer: “Whatever!” *pays for coffee and leaves*