(My father is a dentist, and he is known among his dentist friends for having insane patients. This one really takes the cake, though.)

Dental Office: “Good morning, this is Dr. [name]‘s office. How may I help
you?”

Patient: “Yes, it’s [name]. I’d like to cancel my appointment for today.”

Dental Office: “I’m sorry to hear that. May I ask why you’re canceling?”

Patient: “I have this awful toothache!”