A Literal Pick-Up Technique

(A female friend is visiting from out of state and we are stopping at a grocery store. I am 29 and have very little luck with dating despite having many female friends. When we arrive at the store, I get out, but my friend lags behind to check her phone before leaving my van. I run around and open her door, scooping her up in my arms and jogging to the store.)

Friend: *laughing* “Why are you carrying me!?”

Me: “Because the only way I can pick up chicks is literally!”