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    Telling Porkies About The Chicken

    | Kansas City, MO, USA | Crazy Requests, Criminal/Illegal, Food & Drink, Liars & Scammers

    (I work in the meat department of a grocery store. A customer brings back a package of chicken to be exchanged. She does not have her receipt so I need to ensure we actually carry the chicken and also make sure I get the weight correct on her exchange. The chicken is wrapped in tin foil and then again in a plastic shopping bag. You could smell a faint odor when you get near it but as I deal with spoiled meat occasionally, it isn’t a big deal.)

    Customer: “I bought this yesterday and it’s spoiled. I just want to exchange it for the same thing.”

    Me: “That’s no problem, ma’am. Just let me get the brand and the size for you and I’ll get it.”

    Customer: “Oh, I really don’t think you want to open that dear. It’s pretty bad.”

    Me: “Be that as it may, I have to open it.”

    (Upon opening the initial plastic we discover the tin foil it’s wrapped in. The customer service associate next to me gags and runs from the room. The smell actually makes my throat burn. Nevertheless I have to open it. It’s wrapped in four layers of tin foil and 2 layers of plastic wrap. When I release the last layer of tin foil and can actually see the chicken, it actually makes a ‘burp’ sound as the gas is released. The chicken is green, like pea soup color. I cannot read the label, for all the slime, to see when the expiration date was.)

    Customer: “See, I told you! It’s awful! Wrap it back up, for goodness sake!”

    Me: “Ma’am, when did you say you bought this package?”

    Customer: “Yesterday morning. I was going to cook it for supper last night.”

    Me: “And it looked like that when you bought it?”

    Customer: “No, of course not. Who would buy chicken that looked like that!”

    Me: “I’m going to have to get my manager.”

    (My manager comes over and opens the chicken very briefly. He asks the same questions and gets the same answers.)

    Manager: “Ma’am, it’s 104 degrees outside. Did you, by chance, buy this a few days ago and leave it in your car?”

    Customer: ” Absolutely not! I bought it yesterday and I want another package of chicken! Now hurry up. I have things to do.”

    Manager: “I’m sorry; I can’t exchange this. There is no way this went bad in your refrigerator overnight. In fact, I think you could have left it on your counter and it wouldn’t smell this bad.”

    (After arguing about it for another 20 minutes the customer picked up the package and threw it on the ground. It exploded green chicken slime which landed on the computers and registers nearby, and all over me, my manager, and the customers waiting in line, including a small child. Two customers actually vomited. I was forced to clean the mess. The real sting in the tale is that the customer with the child sued the store and won a $20,000 settlement.)